WWYD Pre-school Lunchtime Attitude

Updated on December 08, 2006
J.B. asks from Overland Park, KS
4 answers

My daughter is in PDO two days a week. I've gleaned from pretend play with her that her teacher tells her what lunch items she can eat first, second, third and uses food as a reward. Honora, my DD, and I spent time with the nutritionists at Children Mercy Hospital and we've learned that controlling mealtimes can turn into battles that may lead to problems like obesity and eating disorders. I'm torn about whether this is an important enough subject to bring up with the teacher or director. On one hand, I think that my DD needs to experience all different levels of authority and that the attitude we take during mealtimes at home balances out anything happening at school. In my opinion, it's not likely this is affecting her that negatively, especially knowing that the teacher does have a kind attitude. But, on the other hand, it troubles me that the preschool educators are not hip to the current methods that pediatricians and nutritionists encourage parents and care givers to employ. Although everything else in her school seems peachy keen, are there other outmoded methods they use, I wonder? Next session she will be attending preschool five days a week and her younger sister will be in PDO, so it's weighing on my mind.

Can you share with me what you would do? Thanks!

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So What Happened?

I asked my daughter's teacher how they tackled lunch with so many kids to handle (I didn't want to accuse or attack her methods). She explained that they do have a short time to get every kid to eat as much as they can to please parents. She also mentioned that they don't have the time to spend monitoring each child and are usually just able to make a casual mention of how a child is eating and urge them along so they can go play outside or in the playroom. I ended the conversation by telling her that I was just curious because it was important to me that mealtimes weren't a control situation. She assured me that with ten kids and two adults they certainly couldn't control all that eating - or not eating in most cases - and we both laughed. I feel pretty comfortable with the situation and I'm really glad you gals advised me to bring it up. Thanks!

More Answers

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T.T.

answers from Kansas City on

That's a good question; I am not sure what I would do. Is she refusing to eat unless it’s in a specific order? If that starts then I might get worried. I am concerned about my almost 4 year old. Just the other day I gave her a glass of milk and a cookie after she had a banana, and she told me she didn’t want the cookie because it was going to make her fat.
I though I was going to pass out!!! (I am trying to gain weight lol) I do think it’s something you will need to watch. If her eating habits start to change at home then definitely bring it up to them, again if you have to.

1 mom found this helpful
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S.C.

answers from Kansas City on

I would definitely say something to your daughters preschool. There are so many different ways of thinking and doing things when it comes to children. One doctor may say one thing and another may say something totally different. But it always comes down to your choice as a parent. It seems to me that this is something important to you for you to take the time to get other people's view on the subject, so what can it hurt to have the conversation with your daughters school. I worked in a pre-school/daycare for a while and it is very hard to keep up on every new idea or method. Generally I think they do what works and try to change and grow to do what is best for the children. I would also find out what their reasoning is for your daughter to eat things in a certain order? I hope I helped

1 mom found this helpful
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R.N.

answers from Kansas City on

I think the first thing you need to do is ask the teacher WHY she teaches that. Maybe it's not the teacher at all. Maybe it's another child acting out what they do at home and your daughter is observing it.

Find out the educational theories of your preschool. Most teach by following the child's lead (in pre-planned themes)but some are very rigid with teaching in structure. Then look at your daughter. Does she need structure to learn or does she learn by exploring first and then you following up after. You just might not be in the right setting.

The good preschool teachers talk time to listen to parents and make adjustments for individual children. Have a discussion with them about your child's needs and see what happens from there.

R.

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A.L.

answers from Kansas City on

J.:

I would have to agree with your thoughts, telling a child what to eat, in order, is not a healthy routine. Making a big deal about food/meals can lead to control and eating issues. It is okay (and encouraged) to teach children about good nutrition, expose them to a variety of foods, and set a good example by fixing and eathing healthy foods. However, telling them what to eat first and using food as a reward is not the best practice. You are the mom and have the right to share your concerns with the teacher.

A. L

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