To Switch Classes or Not to Switch Classes

I would leave it alone. Won't be bad for him to become friends with some new kids which probably won't happen if he is in class with his regular buddies. Also - can you imagine being the principal. They need to balance so many things. Kids' social lives should not be one of them.

I asked about class assignments once and was told the teachers place a lot of thought behind the placements so I would just as is. He will make some new friends and be just fine and he will still see his other friends at lunch, recess, etc...

Leave it alone.

It's a good chance for him to learn how to behave in unfamiliar situations.

Plus,you don't want to set he precedent that he will get special privileges just because he wants something. (Changing classes because he wants to be with his friends...)

And it will likely be easier on the teacher if he ISNT with his friends, because he will be less distracted by his buddies. (Until he makes new friends)

If he's really so social, he will make new friends.

You're too involved in your kids' friendships.

"He/She doesn't have any of his/her friends in his class" is not even on the list of reasons you should switch classes. Or email the principal. No, you should not switch. You should encourage him to make other friends, to hang out with his other buddies when he can, and if his buddies decide they don't like him because he's not in their class, perhaps they really weren't his buddies after all.

This kind of mentality drives me crazy. Do you realize how your post sounds? You are considering calling/emailing the school and asking them to switch your child's class based on friendships?

The school is trying to educate your son. Asking them to use their already stretched time and resources for social reasons is just really offensive to me. Sounds like the best thing for your child is to be in the class with fewer good friends so he can focus on his studies and not be disruptive. Maybe his teacher last year advised that he be separated from distracting friends for that very reason.

Teach your child that school is for learning, change is OK and learning to be independent is an important skill. As mentioned below, if the other boys move on without him just because he's in another class they weren't the greatest friends to begin with.

I would leave it be. You might want to ask the school how they choose classrooms for kids, and they may have broken up the kids on purpose. Or placed him with a teacher that does well with his personality or learning type. I know our school tries to place kids in the "right" environment whenever possible. So it may be that they've thought about this.

What I've told my DD is that if her best friend is not in her class, there is always recess or lunch. I bet your son, being a gregarious type, will do fine making new friends. Remind him about recess and that he can still invite these kids over to hang out. Try to be positive for him.

Leave him where he is.

If he has 10 friends, he obviously doesn't have problems making friends. Trust in your son's ability to adjust. It's healthy for him.

He is in the real world and we don't get to do we want. People come and go in our lives and we have to adjust. Happiness is self made no one can do it for you.

It might be best to stay where he is and hang out with the friends after school instead of in school in the classroom. He might learn a lot more without the buddies.

Leave him where he is.

the other S.

Leave him in the class he was assigned. It will be good for him to make new friends. You cannot and should not create a perfect world for him. That is not real life.

I can honestly say that being away from friends during class is so much better especially if he gets distracted. My daughter and her bff are mortal enemies now because they had class together. It was horrible for the teacher. The girls even had to work with a counselor to help the other girl grow some proper boundaries. She was super clingy and jealous.

I thank God we moved and our girl is out of this situation. He'll be fine and he will cherish the time he's with his friends outside of the classroom even more. Make sure they do get to do stuff together after hours.

You know, i'm aware that this kind of behind-the-scenes wrangling goes on, yet it always amazes me.
I've never switched my son's classes or teachers, and guess what? He's a popular kid with lots of friends who knows everyone.
There's something to be said for that.
We can't orchestrate every aspect of our kids lives!
So unless he's super sensitive or very introverted, i'd let the chips fall where they may and encourage them to make some new friends!

My daughter suffers from anxiety, so for the past 2 years I was able to write to the principal and request her friend be in her class. Oh how I wish I hadn't. Last year they fought constantly. The other girl clung and wouldn't allow her to establish friendships with other girls. If I were you I would let it go. He will meet other friends and see his buds on the playground. Plus, it is really late to be asking for his class to be changed.

By stepping in, you're not giving your son the chance to rise up to the challenge and learn to adapt to this kind of change. It's a great life experience for him. Leave it alone. Let him learn to make some new friends in this class. It won't be hard for him to meet up with his other friends at recess.

This is exactly why our school district doesn't release class lists until 3-4 days before the new school year starts. We put a lot of thought into class assignments. We try to balance classes as much as possible. We look at academics, social interactions, which parents are high maintenance, ESL students, Special Ed students, GT students, student/teacher personalities, behaviors, leaders, etc. Each grade level works with the next grade level to help create class lists that we sincerely hope will benefit all students in the classroom. Parent requests are taken into consideration, but no promises are made. Class lists are not just random groupings. There is no way that we can make everyone happy. Our goal is to put together classroom communities that are going to be successful communities.

I'm hoping that my 2nd grade daughter will not be in the same class with her best friend. They have literally been in the same classroom since my daughter was 6 weeks old. I want to see her exposed to new people. But, I'm really hoping my Kindergarten son will be in the same classroom with his best friend. With both kids we have talked about how they can still see their best friends before school and at lunch and recess. We have also talked up the opportunities they will have to make new friends and expand their group of friends.

I found out who my son's kindergarten teacher will be when we ran into her at the fair and she let it slip that he would be in her class. Out of four choices, she was my third choice. I'm not real happy about his class assignment, but I won't be asking for a change, because I don't know all of the reasons behind why he was assigned to that class. And, I know my son, and I know that he will do well no matter what class he is in.

Personally, I would not ask for a class change only for social reasons.

I doubt your daughter's friend got into your daughter's class just because of an email sent by her mom, there must be more to it than that. Our school RARELY switched kids once classroom assignments had been made, and they certainly didn't do it to make sure kids were with their friends.
Your son will be fine, he will still see his friends at recess and after school and on the weekends. Don't overthink it!

I would leave it alone. If he is as social as you say, he should have no problem making new friends. And I think it's good for learning new social skills. Besides, you can't continue doing this at the beginning of every school year. Just see how it goes.

Looks like your son is about 9. At this age, I would inquire IF there are only say 2 other classes. If your son is in a really big school so the 10 are pretty scattered, then I wouldn't bother. But what class you're in really does have an impact on friendships unless some of these boys are neighbors and/or at lunch and recess they can sit with whomever they want vs by class. So if some of these negatives are the case, I would email the principal and very nicely say it may be too late but you have heard of other kids changing classes and in case it was an oversight, your son is on his own. Our school tries to keep friends together somewhat. Not all 10 but so that each kid has a friend. They're still young. Plenty of time for him to learn to adapt etc. And it sounds like your school is open to this so why not? I'd rather be safe than sorry and have your son come home unhappy every day. Like I said, he's still young.

Since your son is so social I can't imagine him having a hard time making new friends. He will be fine. Leave him be.

I'd leave him where he is. This might be a great opportunity for him to develop a new social identity, as something other than Mr. Talker-in-Class, but he needs to be away from his preestablished group of friends for that to happen. And even if he doesn't form this new identity, chances are very good he'll make new friends and be fine.

He sounds like a good kid. And you sound like a sweet mom.

Our elementary schools would not allow a class change fir this reason.

Leave him where he is. It's quite possible he won't be the excessive talker in a new class. He's still in the same grade level and the grade level children do have other activities and recess together.

Let him adjust to a new situation and see if it helps him. I know class placements are done at the end if the school year when teachers sit own and try to get a good balance for each classroom. Maybe he was separated from friends for a reason so he has the opportunity to mature.

Good luck.

If it were me, I'd leave it alone. It may be that his friends were such a distraction to him that hit was disruptive for everyone-- no teacher wants to pass on a hard situation to another teacher.

I'd also give him the benefit of the doubt that he will find new friends amongst his new classmates. He'll still get to play together at lunchtime recess as well. My son has a variety of playmates from all of the classes within his grade, many he met just that year. The first few weeks CAN be tough, and we kept encouraging him to find kids who were playing something interesting and to join in.

Give your son some credit that he can adapt; it may also be a good thing for him to amongst some new students who might give him a little social pressure to tone it down. I know it was a good thing for my silly boy. The only reason I could see asking the principal to switch classes is if there was an ongoing bullying issue or a huge mismatch with the teacher and student-- and even then, I wouldn't propose this switch until I had enough documentation to present to the administration. Why don't you give it a couple of months and see how he does? Give him time to get to know these new kids before deciding he *can't* handle it.

By the way, I went to 14 schools between K and 12th grades, often starting in all-new classrooms midyear. Kids adapt to being 'new' to classmates every year. Try to think of this as a possibility for a turnaround and some maturity.

PS: you won't get out of the loop if you are seeing each other in the hallways or after school on the playground.

Lots of good advice. The only concern I would have is you would be out of the loop with the other moms of his friends, especially if they are good friends of yours.

Sounds like him being happy might just make it so that his behavior is worse. I wouldn't have the principal move him. Since he's a social creature, he will make friends soon enough. Then you'll have to be opening up notes from his teacher, soon enough.

You can't make your son happy every year. Instead of trying to get him with his friends, spend your energy figuring out what teachers in your son's school are appropriate for his personality type. You have no idea just how awful it can be for teacher and child to be oil and water. Spend time volunteering at the school so that you get to know the parents and teachers, especially a few grades up, and listen with open ears about how the coming teachers act towards their students. It will really help you help your child. A lot more than trying to keep him in a clique of kids...

My son's 2 best friends have never been in the same class. Some how these 3 boys found each other on the playground. My son has classroom friends and best friends.

Our school has a no change class policy. The class list is released a couple days before school starts. We are not allowed to request teachers nor can we request friends to be in the same class together. We can list who we do NOT want in the same class. I am not sure how much weight this request holds. The school tries to make each classroom 'fair' so one room is not stuck with all the trouble makers nor one room with all the high achievers (at least in elementary school).

I do find it odd that not one of 10 friends will be in the same class and it sounds like all 10 expect your son are together. Are there only 2 classes of his grade?

I would leave him in the class that he is assigned. I am actually a bit jealous...we do not get teacher assignments until the day or two before open house.

That being said, I DO manage who my children get as teachers. I go by academics though...not social interaction. If your son is as social as you say, I am pretty sure that he will be fine making new friends.