Son's Daycare Teacher Is Mad at Me, Not Sure What to Do

Maybe the teacher is more upset because of the way the director approached her. Also, she may be upset because you went to her "boss" and not to her first. Put yourself in her shoes. How would you feel if someone had a problem and went right to your boss and not you first. I am sorry but diaper rashes are going to happen no matter how often you change a child's diaper. Orange juice and teething are 2 top reasons for diaper rashes. Are you there the second your child goes every time? I know when my daughters were younger there were a few times I did not get there fast enough and sure enough they had a rash. How quick we are to judge. If diaper rashes did not happen there would be no need for so many creams on the market. If this is the first time I would look at the whole picture, OJ, teething, and a class full of children. It does not mean the teachers were not doing there job.They is only so much anyone can do. Take the time to talk to the teacher and explain how upset you were because your child was hurting. When our children are in pain we become very emotional. If you like the teacher be sure to compliment her also. In the end making mends with the teacher will only help in the future if there are any other problems that arise.

Hi N.,
I know you are upset about your sons little bottom but maybe it truly was an accident. With what you said about teething and the OJ if she didn't notice the BM right away bad things were right around the corner. Your sons teacher probably feels attacked and misunderstood as well as horrible for your sons pain. Give it a day or two and then ask to speak to her privately. Tempers run very hot (and fast) when it comes to our kids. Most people who are child-care providers do it because they love kids, give her a chance. I think this sounds like a case of misunderstandings.
Best Wishes!

You are your son's best advocate. If you did not verbally attack anyone and the director went to the teacher to "ask" the question, you followed correct protocol. I would let emotions die down a bit. The combination of OJ and not changing a diaper promptly was enough to set the situation spinning. Yes, I would be pissed off but you handled the situation "head on" and it sounds like the Director responded professionally too. I would let emotions rest.

As far as getting money back for the field trip and getting reimbursed for your time, like the first post suggested.... your child is going to be ill and you are going to be inconvenienced at times to care for a sick child. It's good that you have a partner who is very hands on too. They very well may have to pay for field trips, in advance. I know I would not expect to get reimbursed for my child's field trip if my children became ill.

Good luck to you.

Hmm, I don't know. The occasions when my kids had diaper rashes that bad were pretty rare - usually only when they had a stomach bug which led to a yeast infection. Maybe other kids are more sensitive, but not able to sit comfortably for a whole day was beyond normal 'pooped during nap' sensitivity for my kids. (but then we don't drink orange juice, either.)

I don't think you had anything to apologize for as long as you weren't using bad language. Parents should feel comfortable asking ANY questions we have about the care our children are receiving. I also don't think there's anything wrong with talking directly to the director about concerns, if that's the person you have a better relationship with, the teacher was busy, etc. Theoretically, everyone's there for the benefit of the kids, right? It shouldn't make any difference.

In any case, as long as the teacher is good with your child, I can't really think of anything else you can do at this point. If she doesn't like you - well, that happens sometimes. All you can do is be polite and professional.

You shouldn't feel guilty for bringing this situation to the director's attention. I think communication is key. Call the director and tell her you would like a meeting with her and the teacher - that you want to clear the air. Tell them what you told us and let the teacher defend her actions. I am curious as to what the teacher will say about the field trip thing and giving you the cold shoulder.

Plus, the teacher needs to know that she is not immune to criticism. You realize that she has a hard job and is doing the best she can. But, you, as the parent, are only advocating for your child, you're not trying to cause her trouble. Maybe the toddler room isn't the room for her - she might be better suited to supervise older children.

I'd also bring them a huge tube of diaper rash cream.

Speak to the Director. No child should have to suffer for an adult's inefficient behavior. The Director should have had her be a "big girl" and discuss with you. Your money for the trip should have been returned and you should have been com. for your "lost time from work", otherwise I would assume, she does not need your business. You need to speak up for your child and all the other children. The problem is that you don't know what is going on, unless you are there. I know that good daycare is hard to find, but you cannot live with this situation. Partner with other parents, perhaps you could take turns sitting in to see what is going on. Look for another day care.

my gut says the director talked to her, its not the first time she's been in trouble and she's pissed because she's gotten in trouble again. I can't see where it would have anything to do w/missing the field trip.

why would you feel guilty? its part of their jobs to deal w/mothers concerns and at times over reactions; you certainly aren't the first and won't be the last.

its her issue. It could be that she's just scared to get in trouble and the other things are unrelated?