School for a 3 1/2 Is It Needed?

You have NO IDEA how amazed I am that so many of us have bought into this lie of early school and socialization! I have 4 and they didn't go to preschool at all. They are all fine students, in fact my oldest was tested for gifted in K- having NEVER gone to preschool!
Our babies are torn from us soon enough! Enjoy this brief time with him! I would also encourage you to re think what socialization means. TRUST me, the things they learn from peers is not something I'm usually happy about :>) Ask yourself what all so important thing you learned from a group of kids you r own age? Also, if raising kids is about preparing them for adulthood then we are false socializing them. When's the last time you or your husband were alone in a room all day with a group your exact same age?
You will blink and he will be a teenager! Relish this short time with him, you will NEVER get it back! Don't worry at all about school!! There is a reason children are born to mothers and NOT preschools and daycares! In your arms is the BEST most PERFECT place for him right now! Blessings.

Hi M.,
I am am an educator and feel very strongly that parents should keep there little ones home with them as long as you can if you are a stay at home mom. These early years are the time you can set their little minds and instill a bond that you can never go back and recreate. I kept my daughter home with me until she was four then she attended pre-k for two half days a week and then gradually went to full days. She transitioned very well into kindergarten and loves school. She is now 8 years old.
I kept her immersed in activities that let her socialize with other kids her age. I brought her to Gymboree and to this day she is friends with several of the children we met in those classes. Even though they all go to different schools. We meet on outings and birthdays. Not to mention, I made some wonderful connections with the moms I met there , too. All our children were about a month apart in age so we really could commiserate through the trials and be supportive of one another.
C.

My son is still in a private home setting part time and he s almost 4. He will go to pre-k soon enough. Sending kids to day care schooling is a recent phenomenon. It was unheard of years ago and was only started to help at-risk kids and kids with no "other choice". There is no more loving place for his basic moral structure to be formed than at home with you. He will be off in the world before you know it. Everyone makes you feel like you are not doing the best for your kids now if you don't send them away as soon as possible for school. Studies show that it really makes no difference at all in their learning - it does help socialization and that is what it is good for. Your son seems as if he doesn't need it with kids in the neighborhood, etc. Keep him home with you - there is no better place in the world for him than with you.

I think this is a personal preference, and as long as you teach your child basic fundamentals,he will be fine to just go to VPK. My daughter is 4 and will be starting VPK this year, she has been home with me since she was 15 months old and is very bright. We stay active, have a mom's group that we do things with, and we do tons of activities on our own. I think they grow WAY too fast and if you are blessed to be able to keep him with you while he is still a "baby" then I say, DO IT :) Good luck!

Hi M.

It fine if he wants to stay home for a year, but make sure he still will have to socialize with other children his age. Join the MOMS Club in your area. It's a great way to meet other Moms in your area, and he can play with other kids his age. I think it is important to put him in VPK next year. He will need the routine of going to school and socializing and learning rules that come with going to school. You don't want him to be to shocked when he finally goes to Kindergarten. I say let him stay home enjoy him and have fun.

C. :)

Good Day,
My littlest one is turning 5 tomorrow; and she started VPK this year! That has been her only pre education experience. She loved going to her school Wexford Day School in Margate; and she just Graduated into kindergarten and she is well prepared for her new year at a new school! So allowing your little man to stay is home is great for you both! More bonding time together; and he will learn just fine in VPK. May God guide & bless you!
Truly,
Kathy N.

Hi M.,

Honestly, I think school is so important for small kids. I mean, atleast part-time. My son is 2 1/2 and turns three in August, he has been attending a great academy (part-time) since January of 09. I can't describe how school has helped him and myself. My son is also very social and smart, but realize something, children now are learning so fast and so much-- I think it will definatly help him stay on track and not behind. Once again, I highly recommend it for him and for you, it will give a little time for you and your other baby. Good Luck and hope all works out! :-)

Does your son have any problems that require him to be at school? (My daughter is autistic and really needed to be there at age 3) If not, of course he will be fine at home until VPK, and probably happier. I would make sure you keep him socialized, either at playdates or playing with neighborhood kids, trips to park, etc... and that is all he should need before VPK :) Once upon a time we didn't send our children until kindergarden! Back then students had much higher test scores than they do today! (The tests have gotten easier, not more difficult)

HI M. - my son was home with me all the time and we always said no preschool until 4 (VPK), around 3 1/2 I saw that he needed it, and I needed it for him. So I found a great school that offered 2 1/2 days (6 hours a week) and it was so great for him. His first year just ended and he starts VPK in the fall-I am not sure how I will handle 5 half days but he is excited to go everyday. If you live in PSL, I can recommend my son's school Sunlight Christian Academy in SLW. The building was brand new this year and all the staff is amazing.

Having said that, I think your son will be fine if he doesn't have any preschool until VPK -it is just a big jump to go from no days to 5 days. So starting a little few days a week thing might be good for him. Another thought, places like My Gym (on corner of PSL Blvd. & Gatlin Blvd.) have classes where around your son's age, the moms don't stay -it's an hour once a week but it's good practice. You can choose to watch in the lobby or you can leave, giving some practice with separation, etc. They also offer camp days where it's 3 hours at a time that you drop him off.
Good luck whatever you decide.

I know of someone who didn't have her daughter in Prek and waited till she was 4 for VPK. Her daughter is just fine and very sociable. I have a two year old and I might do the same. I, in elementary, disliked school b/c I wanted to be with my mom. So I might reconsider earlier to have her in PreK, just cause I want her to get use to a classroom setting and not be so attached to me. But I do say, if you are enjoying them at home, do so. They are only little once. The days are long but the years are short. Good luck with your decision. :o)

i think that socialization is important but it does not have to come from school. you say he is playing with the neighborhood kids, has a sibling and has been to preschool. that seems good to me for a three year old. i only send my daughter to preschool 6 hours a week. she really needs it though and she likes it.
i think you can assess him and go with what you feel is right. they do spend plenty of time away from mom when they are older so this is your time with him. do what works for you. it is always good to evaluate things and get advice.

Follow your heart, he he can wait:) Enjoy them!! And if your concerned about him 'falling behind' just check out some curriculum from the library to work on over the summer or next 'school' year.

To each his own-- all family situations are different and you know what is best for YOUR child.

In general, though, I have always thought it was important for a child to spend some time away from mom. I think it's healthy for BOTH the child AND the mom. Even just one or 2 days a week at a school where he can attend for just a few hours. Everyone says "they need the socialization" but it's not just that. They need to learn how to socialize in a setting where the adult who is keeping them safe is someone who is neutral. For example, if your child is playing with another child in your neighborhood with you there, and they are fighting over a toy, the parents often have an instinct to step in and help, and usually we are convincing our child to give up the toy, right? But at school they actually have opportunities to work things out for themselves with the guidance of the teacher-- they have more opportunities to learn to wait their turn and to figure out how to take turns with others. That's just my opinion-- and he will be just fine if he waits until VPK.

Kindergarden is a recent invention. Before then children got their socialization among siblings, neighbors, friends. Manners, safety, colors, shapes, numbers, etc. were learned at home. Sesamy Street will give you a hand, you'll be surprised how much he picks up from it.Being a stay at home mom brings an apportunity to enjoy lots of one on one moments you will cherish forever. Enjoy it. Good luck and God bless.

M.,

We spend much of our lives going to school and then working. Why do you feel it's so important to get your child into school and socialize him? Soon, and I mean very soon, he will be in kindergarten and then first grade, and so on. He won't be a baby very much longer and the needs you can provide for him will be a thing in the past because he'll be able to do for himself on his own without your help. Embrace and enjoy this time you have with your child. Do you have any idea how lucky we are to be able to stay at home? I have working friends who would give up anything to be home with their children but their financial security is more important, understandably in these poor economic times. I'm a stay at home mom full time and I wouldn't trade going to work or putting my children into school earlier than necessary for anything. I never put any of my 3 children in preschool because I look at preschool as a glorified day care center. What can they teach my children that I can't? The answer is nothing. I can teach them so much more! And so can you.

I would wait....enjoy your time together! He will get plenty of social skills in VPK. Also, if you want him to be more social, make some play dates with other moms with kids the same age. Take him out to the playground, or sign him up for a gym class. there are many ways to socialize a child besides sending them to preschool!

At 3 and a half he will have some separation anxiety. Why not have him partake in the babys' care...get the diaper, fold towels from the dryer, arrange some toys in the room, so many simple yet productive activities.
If there are kids in the neighborhood, a play day is fun. Parents brings snacks, help each other out and get some fresh air...I say let kids be kids while they are kids. School is stressful these days. Take your children to the libray, community center, the zoo, most of these are free or low cost...
Blessings, S.