Potty-training and Disipline

No way! No time-outs for accidents. She is just not ready yet. It will come in time when she is ready. Kids have a natural fear of pooping in the potty. Also, for years they have been used to pooping while standing up, and all of a sudden they have to learn how to do it while sitting and having water splash up on their bottom. No wonder it takes kids longer to poop in the potty. When you put them in time-out for pooping in their panties, they learn "well, I just won't poop at all" and then constipation becomes a real problem. Good luck!

NO, NO, NO. Do not punish your child for having accidents. It takes some children longer to learn to recognize their body's signals than others. Sometimes they learn to recognize balder signals before bowel signals or vice versa. Does she seem to move her bowels at about the same time every day? If so, put her on the potty when you know it's about time for her to move her bowels. If not, out her on the potty every few hours and praise/reward the living daylights out of her every time she "performs." She will get it eventually.

Peditricians strongly recommend giving the child lots of space to take the lead for this developmental stage, which, if no big issue is made of it, can be as natural and satisfying as learning to walk. Do your best to keep it light, keep it fun – read books about pooping, watch videos, pretend that her dolls and stuffed animals are pooping in the potty and feeling proud of themselves. She'll get there.

Pooping is often a much bigger deal, more complicated and effortful, and some children become quite anxious about it if urged or pressured too much. Kids can and do react to pressure by withholding the poop, which then can escalate to constipation, which in turn can become a medical condition called encopresis (google this – it's definitely a problem you want to avoid).

If you keep it positive, and give your little girl encouragement and support without pressure, she'll probably get there faster.

Don't do time outs. Instead try positive reinforcement. It has been proven to have better results. My son had a similar problem. The solution that worked for me was to sit him down and make a deal. Everytime he pooped in the potty, he got a special surprise (matchbox car). I kept a stash of cheap surprises hidden for this purpose. We also immediately hopped in the car and went to the grocery store to get a helium balloon (his favorite) to have a "potty party". It worked!!! Don't do pull-ups either as that can be confusing. You are then telling them, "It's OK to poop in your pants." It will happen in due time!

I would start askinng her if she wants a pullup when she needs to have a bowel movement. I have read over and over how normal it is for children to not master BM's in the potty until later. One reason is physical. They have to be in a certain position physically to actually do it, and the potty is not conducive to that. It won't last forever; eventually those muscles will get stronger and she will be ready. I wouldn't do a time out. Instead, involve her in helping clean up the mess. Then just give it time.