Morman Mission Trips

His family is a bunch of idiots. What horrible people! I know Aspergers kids are highly functioning, but to do this to a child with a disability who very well may NOT be able to function for a year or two in South America or Africa is disgusting. Maybe their LDS bishops or whatever should pay them a visit because this type of behavior doesn't shine a very favorable light on them. It is my understanding that the trip is a year, but that's still a long time.

Yup...this sounds about right to me...of all the Mormons I have met, I can honestly say that yup, if the kid doesn't want to go or isn't "ready", he is out!

~You will notice all the "Mormons" that responded will say differently and have asked you to involve the bishop or other church elders...I say do not do that! Let this kid have some space...his parents have shown their true colors...

Why exactly do you want to know the good and the bad about the mission trips? This kid said he wasn't ready? Are you gonna try to talk him into going, just so he will have peace with his parents?

~They get to go for 2 yrs, to somewhere that gets chosen for them, they are not allowed to have any contact with the outside world (no newspapers, no TV, no internet) except for a phone call home on Mother's Day and Christmas...they can write and except letters and care packages from home...although their is a list of what is and what is not allowed...they are with their "companion" (other missionary) CONSTANTLY and have no alone time, they are never allowed to be alone in a room with a person of the opposite sex and their lives are spent trying to spread the good word and convert as many people as possible to the church. Before actually going on their mission they go to a "boot camp" type place where they are taught (*cough *brainwashed* cough*) how to be a missionary...it is a very strict schedule of studying the scriptures and praying and such...

I hope this kid gets some peace in his life...I know from personal experience trying to leave this church is exhausting, and you get bombarded by "visits" and phone calls and when that doesn't work they lay on the guilt like no other...

As a Mormon, i have to say that this is not at all in line with the teachings of our church. Is it at all possible that you are getting just one side of the story. As a mom to teenagers, they can really distort reality when retelling an event to their friends. If you are trying to help this young man, please don't automatically believe that his parents threw him out because of this and that the rest of the church supports that decision. There is more to this story that you haven't heard. Having said that, our church is made up of sinful humans, just like all churches. We strive each day to make the best choices and be as Christ-like as we can. No one is perfect regardless of which church they join. There is a lot of misinformation out there about the LDS church and the missions. Please either contact his parents or the bishop of his church. They really do want what is best for this young man. There are many counseling resources available to them both inside and outside the church to help heal this family.

Please do not judge all Mormons by this one example. I am a convert to the church and my husband served a 2 year mission in Brazil. This boy's parents have something going on that just isn't right. It sounds like there's a lot of information missing. Yes, young men are highly encouraged to go on a mission, but only if they are eligible. Each individual is different, and having Asperger's could definitely be cause to not serve a mission. And even if he's eligible, that's not grounds to kick him out. I would definitely contact this boy's bishop (leader of his congregation, aka ward) and let him know what's going on. Go to lds.org, click on About the Church at the top, then Find a Meeting House on the left, and enter the parents' address. This will pull up the address and phone number of their ward. If you want to really find out what a mission is like, stop a couple of missionaries and they will tell you. I will be praying for your son's friend.

**Thank you for trying to help him. And thank you for reaching out to find out more information. If you'd like specifics, please contact me directly.**

My in laws are Morman and they wouldn't kick family out as long as they believe in the Morman religion. They are still fully supporting their 21 and 28 year olds...and when I say fully I mean fully! Paying college, rent, elect etc while the "kids" don't even have jobs! On top of that they are helping support my mother-in laws brother when he lost his job and just didn't want to move.

Their is so much about LDS that I think is not "God Like" but for the most part they support their families as long as they stick with the LDS religion. They have never helped me or my husband even when we were dirt poor and he was in the army. I truly believe it's because we do not believe in their religion. Plus my mother in law has told me on numerous occasions they are not suppose to hang around people that are not of their religion unless they are attempting to convert them. I guess that was to help me understand all the movies, pamphlets and bibles she constantly leaves at my house even when I have asked them not too.

As for contacting the church I personally would not. Then they have your information and they will continue to contact you. My in laws signed me up as a memeber of their church and I emailed a very nice note to the bishop and asked to be removed and he said it didn't work that way. huh?? He did give me a 1 year break from receiving all mail but it will start up again next August he said!

I am a Christian but here are my questions that a Morman will not answer that tells me to stay away!

1. They will not let a non-morman in their Temples except for when it is just built. They aren't allowed to talk about what goes on in the Temples! What is so special that you need to hide behind these elaborate buildings?...The God I know loves ALL men sinner or not and would invite you into his house because he doesn't want to loose any of his children!!

2. I have been told they seal your marriage in the temple so that when you die you will still be married to the same man in heaven. HUH? I don't need to be sealed to meet my family in heaven!

3. Joseph Smith their prophet. Have they ever read in the bible not to believe in false prophets and that their will be false prophets? I don't think my salvation is worth loosing over believing in a prophet that is having them build temples to worship God but won't let anyone in.

My husband told me he had to go through Seminary training in high school which took an elective away from him and actually cost him credit 4 years in a row. He knows the bible and the Book of Morman inside and out because he was trained too! And at this point in his life he is anti-religion and has even told me he doesn't think their is a God. If that is what the Morman religion has done to him then I want no part of it!

Maybe he just wants to escape it all. Maybe he is lost and doesn't know what the answers are. Talk with him and see what he is feeling. Find out if he would like to go to a different church. Let him know God still loves him no matter what!

You both are in my prayers.

As a Mormon . . . ok well an inactive Mormon, this just doesn't sound right. Normally they have to go through a physical and I'm pretty sure mental evaluations. It's tough to go on a mission. Usually with your bishops and Stake presidients permission. I agree with a previous poster saying to contact his bishop and have some sort of mediation to figure out there side of the story, just to make sure.
I find it hard to believe that they kicked him out just because he wasn't "ready". Something just doesn't seem right. If you need help in anyway let me know and I can see if I can look things up on the website. Or help contacting his bishop.

*** Note to Karma we are not brainwashed. What they are taught is lessons to teach others. Perhaps you should actually do homework and not just assume. And I wasn't saying to put him on the plane to go to the MTC (Missionary Training Center "aka" boot camp) They are strict because it's a mission for god and not a vacation. Often times they think it's a time to party since they are free from their parents for the first time. I also was meaning to get a hold of his parents to find out whats really going on and not to force him to go on a mission. And yes there are parents that are disappointed that their kids don't go on missions, but they usually are the crazy uber religious ones ( kind of like how every religion has the crazy ones) The campanion is there to keep each other safe, like when kids have a buddy system when on a field trip. So there are always safe and logical reasons why we do things.

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I believe in going directly to the source for answers:

Have you talked to the parents? Did they tell you that's why they kicked him out? Often teenagers share the story that they think will elicit the most sympathy- not the truth. First and foremost- you need to call this kids parents.

For accurate information about the lds church- lds.org or mormon.org
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That sounds kind of fishy to me. I don't know if you are getting the whole story. I am not a mormon but have several great friends who are. All of them are extremely nice and reasonable people. I dont think that kids are required to go on a mission trip, it is encouraged and a celebration if they are called to do it.

Kids with aspergers love routine. They are uncomfortable in new circumstances. The parents have to be crazy to kick a kid out like this. I mean crazy. I would not send my own child out without a way for him to contact me, much less a child with this disability. Nevertheless I would not send him back to live with his parents. He is going to have a tough life anyway and will need a lot of guidance. Does he have any other family? He is going to need you big time.

Sounds like the parents are inflicted with some type of mental dysfunction as well and passed it on to their son.

What a horrible way to treat a child with Aspergers. What are his strengths? What is he uber smart in? I can't imagine him having a very successful mission experience with this issue unless he can be assigned to South / Central America where the people and culture are super loving and non-judgemental.

He can always go to college first and get help and go on a mission later if HE wants to.

I grew up with lots of Mormon friends who went on missions, some did not. I have never heard of a family treating their son this way. But at 19 it might be time for him move on out the house and start his own life anyhow.

Wow, this doesn't sound right at all. I am a Mormon and served a mission to Korea. In order to go on a mission, you must have a physical exam and be cleared by a physician as healthy enough to go. Usually missionaries are sent off to different states and countries, but if they have physical or mental needs such as this, they can serve from their own homes, usually in a service or humanitarian mission. There is limited phone contact, but we could send & receive weekly letters or emails. Boys go for 2 years, Girls go for 18 months. I absolutely loved my time in Korea, I miss the people and the food the culture every day. Learning Korean in such a short time was amazing. It was such a wonderful, fun experience. I would definitely contact the parents and see what's going on. It seems like the son either gave false information....or perhaps the parents really do have some issues that need to be addressed!! I can't think of ANY normal parent who would kick their child out of the house...espcially a child with Aspergers...for such a reason. Let me know if you have any other specific questions about missions and be sure to let us know what happens.

The Church would most likely not allow this young man to go on a mission. They may be overreacting. There are many circumstances where young men, or young women, are not accepted and mental capabilities would be taken in to consideration.

To be really sure of the true situation I would find out who the Bishop or Stake President is in the local Ward/Stake area and bring this situation to their attention and make an appointment to talk to them about what to do. It may be that they are unaware of things and need to be notified.

In the phone book there will be many listings, most of them will only have someone answer during Wednesday evening or on Sunday mornings. The church is usually not open other times. there will also be a listing for the Dallas Temple on Willow, this is open for daytime and evening hours. The Temple workers who answer the phone may be able to give you a phone number to call and perhaps even help answer your questions too.

Also, this young man needs to have the support and stability of his friends even if his family is disowning him. He needs his routine and part of that may include going to church, even if it's in another Ward. His choice of course.

I no longer choose to go to my ward, I think it's a shame when one family acts like this and it makes everyone look at the church like we're looneytunes but really, 99% of LDS church members (Mormons) are not like this family. Most are loving supportive families that give everything they have to help their children have the basic foundations they need to succeed in life, such a s a full college education, maybe a down payment on the first house or reliable transportation, food, clothings, even when they are married and have their own families. I know of one family in my home ward that have 9 children and one of them lost his job, downsizing, and he cannot find work anywhere in the world, he has been faithfully trying. They are financially supporting his family so his wife won't have to work outside of the home and he can go back to school and retrain so he can support his family again. This is the true nature of the LDS family. Love, support, giving, selflessness, and

Most of my LDS friends absolutely loved their missions and could not wait to go. So, if your son's friend isn't excited about his mission, it doesn't sound like he's ready. Maybe he never will be ready. It's a life-changing event, but it isn't for everyone. I'm sorry he and his parents have had a rupture over this.