Losing My Mind....

Updated on November 30, 2008
S.C. asks from Lynn, MA
40 answers

Hello
I have a 10month old boy and he recently I think he caught a cold we went to the doctors said there is nothing we can do and to ride it out.. Thats all fine and well but now his cough sounds like an 90 year old smoker so is it because i have a humidifer running constanly that it is breaking up the mucus? Should I be concerned or is it a run of the mill cold cough? (this is the 1st time he has been sick) Also the past 5 days he is just non stop whining and only for me when my husband is home with him and i'm out he is fine plays with him and eveything.. But than for me he just whines I am starting to lose my mind is just because he is sick? I don't know what else to do for him.. Any suggestions?

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So What Happened?

Hey Everyone!
I just want to THANK everyone for all your responses it was nice to know that I am not alone, after posting that I felt kind of bad to say that I was losing my mind because of my sweet, innocent baby!! But the truth be told that when he is sick things change and I felt like everything I did wasn't making him happy sitting on my lap he would still whine etc.. (I know its because he is sick, so I am waiting for the light at the end of the tunnel!!LOL). I think I am going to follow the advice of mostly all of you and call the DR again it will be 8 days tommorrow for the runny nose and 6 for the cough (and it doesn't sound like the croup) so I might wait til 10 days if it doesn't worsen.. (there hasn't been a fever since day 3).. THANK YOU AGAIN I will let you know what happens with the DR!!!
S. & Carmen
P.S. I got the whole day today off from My husband and son!! So I am feeling a little rejuevinated (spelling) :)

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G.L.

answers from Burlington on

When my daughter started daycare at 1 she was sick with EVERYTHING. RSV, colds, Fifth's disese. I thought I would lose my mind if she whined one more second. I recently read an article saying that colds and flu's are healthy for kids to get as it strengthens their immune systems. Which hepled me feel a little more at ease about illness. Sometimes taking a bath together and giving a massage with a little oil and lavender can work wonders for a cranky kid.

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M.J.

answers from Boston on

Sorry to say but when a child gets sick they only want their mother. Get used to it because they dont grow out of it either. With the cough, Keep an eye on it if it feels like a vibration in his chest, But most kids get that cough because they dont know how to bring it up. It will pass.................Good Luck.

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C.F.

answers from Boston on

Try putting one of those vapor plugs in his room. The menthol smell will help soothe his cough.

Babies (and toddlers) tend to whine and cry with those they are most comfortable with. Him crying only with you shows that he completely trusts you enough to be himself and show you how he's really feeling.

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K.W.

answers from Boston on

You are the Mom, I would take the baby back to the Dr.'s and have him listen to the babys cough. Too bad if the Dr. does not like it. Things can get worse from the average cold. Even if the Dr says that it is nothing at least you will feel better inside. I hope your baby is feeling better soon. It really is so hard when they are sick.

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B.M.

answers from Boston on

Croup is going around right now, my son just got over it. Mother's instinct is usually right. If you feel he has more than just a "cold" bring him back to the pediatrician and tell them. Although, croup is viral and there isn't much you can do about that, either.

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L.W.

answers from Boston on

If he doesnt get better, the cough sounds real bad, bring him back to the dr. A good home remedy is putting Vicks vapo rub on the bottoms of his feet at night, covered with socks. It should make a difference overnight! Good luck!

L. - mom of 2 girls, 3 & 7

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B.S.

answers from Boston on

Stacey, dear, You didn't mention whether your son had a temperature. That's key. If he has a temperature and his other symptoms are worse-- you might consider taking your baby back to the doctor. Don't hesitate because you think the doctor might say something critical to you.

I wish you the best.

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K.T.

answers from Boston on

Does he have a fever? If he does I would call the dr and tell them he has a fever too, and if he doesnt have a fever, I would still call them and tell them his cough is worse than when you brought him in, just like you said as a smokers cough. Press the issue that you want him checked again, and you want something given to him. With a cough like that, it doesnt sound like a run of the mill cold. Keep us posted, best of luck!!

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M.T.

answers from Springfield on

Unfortunately, a baby's cold can last up to 2 weeks. I've dealt with this with my 17-month-son a lot since the weather has gotten cold. If the cough is really bad, bring your baby back but they may just tell you again to ride it out. If it is nonstop for 2 weeks and doesn't get better, bring your baby back. This happened twice with my son and since the cold didn't get better he went on antibiotics and the doctor said it was a sinus infection. Of course, if a fever develops bring your baby back to the doctors asap since an infection has most likely occurred. Keep on running the humidifer, raise the head of the crib a little, run a hot shower and bring your baby in the bathroom with the steam for 15-20 minutes, try using saline (AYR makes a gel one that is a lot easier to use than the spray) and keep the baby hydrated. It is very hard this winter season now that the doctors are saying not use cough medicines. Good luck and let me know if you have any questions!!

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M.O.

answers from Boston on

Just check with your Dr to make sure that it is not RSV which is a resp virus that could be dangerous if not treated properly.Also I used to give my children tylenol for irritability and whiney behavior check with your Dr for dosing and how often. Hope this helps...

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A.G.

answers from Boston on

Hi S. --

I have two boys (now 5 and 3) and my youngest has had multiple issues with colds, coughs, breathing, and asthma.

I think it is very hard when these little guys get sick as they do not "suck it up" at all -- I always found mine to be at their worst with me. I think your little guy feels safest to let it all hang out and really get comforted by you. I found that the best way to deal is to take some breaks -- get out of the house when someone else can be with him. Take the time to relax -- get a cup of coffee, get your nails done. Just decompress. Then, when you are home again, try (as best you can) to slow down and go with what he needs. If he wants to be held all the time, watch a tv show or read a book and order pizza for dinner. Don't try to do too much until he lets up. Find things to do with him that you can do -- play dough ? Picture books ?

The other issue is the actual medical problem.
Here is what I have learned from my son's illnesses:
I would definitely follow up -- don't think you're being neurotic. New symptoms can mean a new issue that your doctor may be able to treat rather than telling you to go home and wait it out.
He could have had a cold and now it is settling into his chest.
Either way, get him to drink a lot and don't worry about his eating -- my little guy always gave up eating a lot when he had a cold and then ate buckets of food when he felt better.
Call today if it's getting worse or he develops a new symptom.
If he has a fever as well or develops a fever, he may have an ear infection or a throat infection (strep?).
The most important issue with his cough is his oxygen level -- they measure that in the doctor's office with the little thing on their finger.
His cough may be very efficient -- like you said, he's just getting all the mucus of a cold out.
Or his cough may be a little more serious and he needs to be more closely monitored.
If he looks or sounds at all wheezy or like he is straining a little to take in a breath, then he may need a nebulizer.
All of this is very manageable and treatable, but, if you are worried at all about his cough, you need your doctor's opnion.
I feel that, over time, I have come to learn a lot more about my son's symptoms of a cold versus a cough, etc etc, but it has taken time and advice from my doctor.
I always felt that I could deal with his illness so much better once I had the doctor's diagnosis.

Good luck !!

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J.F.

answers from Boston on

Did the doctor test him for croup?

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J.L.

answers from Springfield on

It seems that my 3 year old has this same cold. Went to the dr. on Friday convinced she would say he had bronchitis or pneumonia considering how bad his cough sounds, but she said its a cold he needs to ride out. They recommended rubbing vicks vapor rub on the soles of his feet at night which supposedly reduces coughing. As for the whining thing, totally normal. Kids save their worst behavior for the person they trust the most, usually mom. My son will play happily with my husband. He can take him on errands and he's perfectly well behaved. They come home and as soon as he sees me he starts whining.

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B.L.

answers from Boston on

Colds may develop into an ear infection towards the end of a week. So maybe you want to go back to the doctor and have it checked. Also I found that babies tell their mothers how they feel (thus the whining) and set their pain aside to play with their dads. This is what my daughter calls it: Mothers are for Love; Fathers are for Fun. So don't lose heart, even if you're losing your mind! Ask the doctor about the cough too, is "croup" still around?

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J.M.

answers from Springfield on

S.,hi there, i have 2 children and my youngest is 3.5 months...she's come down w/ a cold as well. The cough is very rattely. No fever. Whining...and so forth. Doc suggested using saline nose spray 2drops each nostril.it helps break up mucus so they can work it out.i also use a cool mist humidifier..just be sure you clean it daily.also keep baby elevated while sleeping this really helps.

Good luck,
J. m

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K.A.

answers from Boston on

Echoing the crowd.... Go back to the MD. My daughter is now 6, but when she was little, I learned this lesson the hard way. I took her to the MD with "a cold". They sent us home. Four hours later, she seemed a little worse, but I figured it was 'just a cold' and continued rocking her and soothing her as best I could. Two hours later we were in the NICU at Children's Hospital and she wasn't breathing. She was fine, but I am traumatized to this day. The lesson I learned is that children change quickly when they are ill. Even if you have a cracker-jack pediatrician (which, btw, I believe I do), they can only make decisions based on the symptoms they see. So if the symptoms change, you need to go back as if the illness is brand new. Even if that means twice in one day.....Sorry if this post is scary. I just hope it gives someone the courage to "be a pest" when you want to do what the MD says and your heart tells you not to...

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J.M.

answers from New London on

Your baby ust might be ALLERGIC to something or chemically sensitive to something you're wearing, using on your hair, laundry, etc--something your husband isn't wearing. OR, possibly an air freshener or scented candle, dish soap, etc. could be a problem--especially if he sounds like a 90 year smoker. That is exactly how an allergic cough sounds-- like it comes right from the toes! And it can cause great respiratory distress. Believe me I know--I have extreme sentivities to almost EVERYTHING scented or CHEMICALLY derived--and even some purely natural plant originated things. It causes respiratory distress, nausea, pain, fatigue, skin rashes and a whole lot of other symptoms depending on the substance, along with a lot of time lost being miserable. Imagine your baby going through that and not being able to tell you any other way but crying. If he is sensitive to mold, the humidifier could be compounding the problem. Try turning off the humidifier and not wearing anything scented around him and not using clothes or linens that have been laundered in scented products for a week and see what happens. I know the docs tell you to use Dreft for the flame retardant effect, but it's still made flame retardant with CHEMICALS and FRAGRANCE is added, chemically. If your child is sensitive, you could be putting him through unnecessary stress--not to mention addint to your own. And believe me, doctors are clueless about chemical sensitivities--regardless of what they tell you. They simply aren't taught about it in medical school and if they haven't lived it, they simply don't believe how serious it is. Try suspending all of that for a short while and see what happens--what do you have to loose?

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S.L.

answers from Springfield on

hi S....im new to mamasource and saw this....how have things worked out for you?

S.

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N.W.

answers from Boston on

Try using the steam from the shower this always seem to help my kids when they were little. My oldest has asthma, so i would just keep an eye on him, can or have you tried baby's tylenol drops. Try vicks vaporizer steam that was the best for my kids. But I hope he feels better soon.. That cough as you said sounds like a 90 yr. old that is not good. Get a 2nd opinion. But coughs now a days seemingly to last for a few weeks.

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R.B.

answers from Boston on

S.,
Go with your gut.

My personal rule of thumb: Fever of 100 or higher that doesn't break to normal after 3 days requires a doctors visit.

A cough, that is productive and lasts longer than 5 days - needs to see a doctor. Could be from an ear infection, esp. if there was sinus congestion prior to or with it.

Not sure how long he's been sick from your post - but no matter what my pedi says, I'm "Mom" and I know best. I'm not afraid to go to Children's ER after hours if I feel that my child has something that needs to be addressed. I've never been wrong...and you should never feel that your pediatrician would doubt you.

Better to go and have it be nothing, than not go and find that it was something. :)

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B.G.

answers from Portland on

Hi S., Your doctor is right. Ride it out. I know that as the mom you feel like there should be something you can do and it is hard to watch your baby be uncomfortable. There is a vicks vapor rub for infants which I have had some success with. Make sure he takes in plenty of water.Keep it up with the humidifier.As for the whining only with you, he does that because you are the person he is most comfortable with and he feels like he can be his worst self with mom. It will end. Been there many times. Make sure that you are getting the sleep you need or you'll have the cold too! good luck. Beth

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M.S.

answers from Burlington on

Having a sick baby is so hard, they do whine a lot and it wears on your nerves. He may also be teething which adds to his ( and your ) misery. I'd give him baby aspirin and cough syrup. If he starts to have trouble breathing or has a high fever the doctor should see him again but a cold usually just goes away by itself. Maybe taking more time for you and leaving him with your husband is a good idea too. You need to have a break from it.

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N.E.

answers from Bangor on

Hi S., Our 14 month old baby girl sounds just like your son,as if she is going to choke or cough up a lung...I finally bought some cough syrup with Elderberry in it at the health food store..she loves it and it doesn't have alcohol or any chemicals...she has been taking it for 2 nites..so I can only say I slept a little better last nite...I hear a alot about RSV a Respitory Infection which is common for babies. but one that you can't really do anything about...we use a humidefier too.. My Dr said to bring her outside in the cold air if it got real bad..that is more for Croup though..for me as long as she is playing and eating and gnerally happy most of the time and no fever I consider it jsut acold..but boy do peole look at me funny in the store when she starts hacking..are you comfortable calling your Dr...My daughter goes to daycare so picks up everything...yet they don't mention the coughing, it is definitley more pronounced at nite time..I hope things get better oh and the crankiness/clinging to you...keep taking time for you....it is hard but necessary for our sanity! Love him up, N.

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M.H.

answers from Providence on

Hi S.,

Does the cough sound like a bark? Is he wheezing? Is it worse at night? The reason I ask is because my 8 month old daughter was just admitted to Hasbro with croup. They said that it is going around like crazy right now. Just make sure you listen to his cough and breathing (at night especially)- if the breathing sounds obstructed or strained, let your doctor know. The cough that goes along with croup sounds like a seal bark. BTW my daughter only whines for me too, but I remember only wanting my mother when I was sick too.
Good luck with everything. I hope he's back to normal soon!

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F.V.

answers from Boston on

Hey, what your saying is very familiar.
In Preschool they would want to send my youngest home because he , when has a cold, souds like he has a "3 pack hack".
I took him to too many Dr visits to count and let just say..
out $ and told he's fine, "he just has a cough. Let it go for a few weeks and it will go away." (Usually it did, just once did I hold out too long, and it turned to something worse than a cough but nothing too serious)
So this may be the way he sounds, may be not you'll know after a few times :P

My advice:
Keep it up with the humidifier, so long as it is clean and the humidity dosen't get too high.
Bathe him with 3-5 drops of Lavender essential oil in the bath before yopuput him in swirl around just before bed time, or use the shower and put Tea-tree (5drops) in the shower let the room get really steamy and then read a book in there together. (I know strange, but works)
Keep him hydrated with heavly watered down juice, and soups (with stars works for me still)
And keep an ear out for a change on sound or length of cough.

As for the whiney, my husband does the same thing, NO! just kidding!!
It will last but if you give a little extra time when sick but be firm when you need to do something (ie cook dinner) he'll get it after a while. Try the highchair in the kitchen close by?
Good Luck!

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L.W.

answers from Providence on

Hi S....if the Dr. said it's just a run of the mill cold and you have faith in this Dr... it probably is. I went through a very similar thing with my son. He is four now. He also had that deep ..what I call "honking" cough. My pediatrician explained to me it is because their bronchial tubes are small and narrow and immature at this age. I always ran the cool mist humidifier for him (dont forget to keep the door open in the room.. you don't want mold). It always helped him breathe more freely and stay more confortable. I also always raised the head of his mattress and as he became older and it was age appropriate.. raised his head with extra pillows. As your Dr. about Vick's baby rub and how to use it appropriately for your child's age. At that time, they were okay with certain children's cough syrups and such..now they are not recommending anything due to some incident. I never thought they helped all that much anyway. If your little one is not feeling progressively better over the course of the week....I would always just call the Dr.'s office. I didnt care about being a pain in the behind. I needed to be sure I was comfortable with his condition and what I was doing to help him out. Also..push those fluids! Just a little FYI....from one Mom to another.

Oh..and the reason your little one whines is because he does not feel well...::giggle:: Mom is always the one we want when we are sick. Good luck, and I hope he feels better very soon!

L.W.

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S.D.

answers from Portland on

Take him back to the dr asap. Mama always knows best. Also, symtoms can worsen and drs want to know when that happens. You are the best advocate for your child dont be afraid to use that voice. Even if it is a "run of the mill " cold you will feel better going back to the drs. Thats why they are there!!
Good luck!

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M.S.

answers from Portland on

Hi S.,
I would bring him back in for another check. He may have developed an ear infection. Things can change that quick with an infection of some sort. Even if he does not end up having an infection, you will have peace of mind :0)
Good luck and I hope your little guy feels better!
M.

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K.G.

answers from Boston on

S., try to stick it out and take some deep breaths. I just went through the exact same thing with my 10 mo. old daughter. Her cough sounded terrible but my doc said it was caused by post nasal drip from her stuffy nose. The cough will last way longer than the stuffy nose so just try to be patient. Keep changing the humidifier water daily. I used saline drops with a blub syringe, and vics baby rub at night.

My daughter basically wanted to be held and cuddled all day because she too would whine, but when I wanted to go crazy, I thought about how fast this time is going to fly by and before I know it, she won't want me to hold her anymore and I will miss these days. So I try to cherish every moment (the easy and even the not-so-easy days). Hang in there and good luck!

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J.H.

answers from Boston on

Hi S.,

My son also had some respiratory problems when he was 10 months old, with colds, and all that fun stuff. There are a couple of things that you can do. Add 1 to 2 drops of tea tree oil to his humidifier it will clean the air. Also elderberry is a great herb for boosting the immune system and helping to clear respiratory problems. You can buy it at the COncord, Co-op or Granite State Natural foods, it comes as a cough syrup or as a capsule. If you pull apart the capsule you can add the powder to his bottle, juice, formula or breast milk. Also use your finger tips to do light tapping between his shoulder blades, this will help to break up congestion.
Best Wishes,
J. Hunter, LMT, RPP
All Elements Healing Therapies
###-###-####

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L.C.

answers from Boston on

Hi S.,
Hang in there.. I have three young girls.. and two of them when they were really little went through long bouts of coughing. It was awful, and the coughing always seem to worsen at night! But for me, it usually went away on it's own, (although it would seem to go on for an eternity). The latest research indicates that cough medicines do nothing ( i never liked them anyway.. ) and that a teaspoon of honey works just as well. (he's over a year, so he's probably fine having raw honey now..) But my biggest advice is not to stress and worry over the cough.. it will go away eventually, and there's nothing that can be done, but ride it out, and use the humidifier which you're doing.. Also, i found that trying to raise their heads with some pillows at night would help a little.
I know how awful the cough can sound; rest assured it's normal, and will go away.

Not sure what to say about the constant crying and whining, other than he may be feeling your stress. Also, let him learn to self-soothe from time to time, and not let him rely on you 24/7.

Good luck! My girls are ages 3,4 and 6, and although i can't say it get's easier yet (ha ha), You do learn not to stress out as much over things! LC

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K.G.

answers from Hartford on

Make sure it's not a barking cough at night....could be croup...a cold should last between 10 and 14 days...he's gonna feel miserable at different parts of the day...poor guy...keep watch of his ears that fluid from his sinuses doesn't drain in there and cause an ear infection....Believe it or not, I use to put my babies in there infant seat when they woke up at night from their sleep because of a cold they were elevated upright more making it easier for them to breathe and they would go back to sleep. If his nose is clogged you can get saline drops at cvs, rite aid...stop n shop...put a few drops in each nostril and then suck it out with an asperater...I call it the "boogie sucker..." He will cry...wouldn't you? But, it will get some of that garbage out of his nose and making him feel a little better. Your husband can hold him down while you put the stuff up his nose....it doesn't hurt...it just feels like he got water up his nose...make sure he doesn't have a fever over 100...if he does...call the doctor...he has an infection and might need antibiotics. Elevate his mattress in his crib...put a pillow UNDER the mattress...Don't let him sleep on the pillow....Well, good luck...hope he feels better...once he can get a more soundful sleep....he'll feel better....and so will you! Promise!

take care,

K. G

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M.W.

answers from Providence on

My son started that when he was getting teeth.
He got the nasty cold and cough, and then within a week or so .. i could feel hard spots on his gums and sure enough he had a couple teeth popping through.
check his mouth out.

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M.S.

answers from Boston on

hi S., i feel bad for you,your baby loves you very much,and he feels that only you can comfort him,everybody his getting colds, my 9 month old,had a cold for 2 weeks,his ped. gave him antibiotics,now his fine,i think that the tething has a lot to do with it,plenty of fluids helps,don't lose your mind,enjoy your baby they grow up so fast, good luck with your c-section,it takes a while,i bartend,and thats my workout and its improving,good luck connie

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J.B.

answers from Boston on

I would keep my eye on the cold. Check back in with the doc, the little ones' colds change so fast.

As for the whining, it is unfortunately a big part of them being sick. They want "they're mommy". It is so draining, but it should go away when the illness does. I find it particularly hard as well because my daughter is usually so independent. But, remember its temporary....

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A.K.

answers from Boston on

aaaggghhhh.... its fun being a mom isnt it lol
im going through the same two things with my daughter but she is almost 3
if the coughing thing goes on for more than two or three weeks visit the dr again
if he is coughing stuff up ... encourage him to do that and make sure it is clear, if it is dark yellow or green and its not snot visit your dr AGAIN. The worst your doc can do is get tired of seeing you, at least you know you've done everything to make sure your son is ok.
As for the whining... I noticed the same thing with my daughter recently .. she whines for me and around me all the time and wont do what i ask her to ... but when daddy asks her to do something she doesn't give him a problem. My guess is that he looks to you for comfort and you give that to him and he looks to daddy as a playmate. I think its because the babies are bonded with the mother since before birth so they find comfort in them more than with the father... not that one is better than the other but i guess they just feel closer with mom and therefore whine a heck of a lot more with us lol.
try not to lose your mind ... it really doesnt go away until they are out of the house :-b
good luck with all of this and remember that if the cough sticks around more than a couple weeks or so to see the doctor again.
-A.

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R.S.

answers from Providence on

Little sick ones are always so whinny for their moms. A cold will last usually about 14 days. My son has asthma & has had croup about 2x/year since he was about 1 month old. So I sympathize with the bad nights. To make the nights easier, make sure you keep him as upright as possible. I've always slept sitting as upright as possible (often on the couch) & propped my kids up on my chest & put Vick's on myself (to avoid skin irritation with my kids sensitive skin). I've also kept it cold where they're sleeping. (I often sleep next to an open window on the couch with lots of blankets). The cold air usually helps (even if it's not croup). Also, a steamy bathroom will help with any coughing fits. I would also recommend Motrin & popsicles for any sore throat he may have & they sell the all natural cough lolipops for kids over 2. I've used them with my little one, because she only sucks on them for a few minutes. Good luck & know there are many of us out there who sympathize. Nothing worse then sick babies (except maybe a sick man LOL)

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K.K.

answers from Boston on

Hi S.,
I feel for you and your son. It's tough when they can't talk and tell you what hurts the worst. Is the cough keeping him up nights? There are some night cough meds for babies you might ask for. Colds, sadly do take their time, but if he continues to be sick, he might have developed an ear infection because of the mucus and congestion. If you notice a fever or he stops eating, I'd take him right back to the doctor. I'm not a fan of antibiotics, but if there is infection that is not going away on its own, you need them. You might want to raise the head side of his crib slightly by putting a book under the mattress on each side. That decreases the head congestion. Coughs can sound really scary. If it sounds like he's barking, get him back to the doctor as well...it might have turned into croup. Watch his little chest and his neck; if it appears that he's straining to breathe, it's probably croup...a very scary sounding but often not dangerous virus. My older son used to get it often and it really saps the energy out of a parent and a kid. But by day, it's usually less awful. As for the clinginess, sadly, it's par for the course. They feel lousy and only mommy will do. Hang in there.
K.

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P.B.

answers from Springfield on

S.,
Sorry you are going out of you mind! I have been there SO many times myself! Anyway, can you escape and get out on your own for a few hours? Any way you can exercise? That is what always helped me with my level of stress. My daughter has ALWAYS whined with me because I have been a very sympathetic ear!
If his cough sounds different than when he went to the docs I would either take him back or call and talk to the nurse. I would also be careful of the humidifyer because if you are not vigilant about cleaning it or changing the water you could be putting mold and other toxins into the air and right into everyone's lungs.
All the best to you!
P.

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N.P.

answers from Boston on

As far as the cough goes, I'd probably just keep an eye on it and if it continues to get worse, I'd bring him right back to the doctor!

The part I really wanted to respond to is the whining... Your son sounds EXACTLY like my 9 month old nephew... he's teething and had slight bronchitis and when his mom was around, he'd whine constantly wanting my sister to hold him... the minute my sister was gone and my nephew's father had him? He'd just play and was happy as can be! I just wanted you to know you're not alone!!

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