Leaving Children in the Bathtub Alone

My son was 3.5 years old when he drowned 2 years ago. He went to the city pool every day the summer before and was very familiar with water. Boys (for some reason) have a higher chance of drowning before the age of five than girls do, but you shouldn't leave them unattended before the age of 5. By the way, it wasn't me, the mother, who let this happen.

my youngest son is 14 and I still listen while he is in there lol. if a bottle of shampoo slams the wall or floor he yells "I'm ok mom" before I have a chance to ask lol. I do think 25 months is to young.

My daughter will be 8 yrs in a month or so, I just recently started letting her bathe/shower alone. Even still, every 5 mins I am yelling into the bathroom to see if she is OK. =)

When your children are elementary school age and tell you to go away.

I know 2 children who drowned in the bath... one 3ish and the other 6. The 6 year old hit their head and was convulsing in the tub, so sounded like they were happily playing. While I know that can happen at any age, it made a profound impression on me. At 7 nearly 8, I let kiddo bathe by himself about 1/2 the time... but I still talk to him periodically (every few minutes... a person can go without o2 to the brain for a few minutes without damage, so that's my guide). The other half I sit and we talk about his day or he tells me stories or I just read a book. I may seem paranoid, but I feel pretty relaxed about the whole thing. Then again, I grew up with public baths the size of swimming pools and everyone naked... so the whole "privacy" thing just isn't a family standard in our house. It's not like he's doing anything in the tub/shower that I shouldn't see after all. Older, sure... but he's a KID. When he's a teen, he'll get privacy. Until then, I'll keep as much of an eye on him in the tub as I do when he's in a pool.

BTW... until Kiddo outgrew it (at around age 3.5) I used to fill up one of the BIG plastic toy buckets (the kind with rope handles) to about bellybutton level with water, and then several inches of bubbles and drag it/him around the house with me while I cleaned or cooked. Started it a few months after he was sitting up on his own comfortably.

WOW yes too young definitely at 25 months! My youngest is 4 1/2 and I still sit with him while he takes a bath, but I know in the next year or so I'll feel more comfortable being nearby. Enjoy the time with your baby while they're in the tub now. These days will be gone before you know it! =-)

NO he is to young!!! Way to young to be left alone. The laundry, phone, and tidying up can wait until your done bathing him. Between the ages 4 and 5 is when I would be earshot away.

I think about school age - 5-6 years old.
25 months old is definitely too young! My daughter is 2.5 and I would never even dream of leaving her alone in the tub...

Just remember that they can drown in just a few inches of water - I would rather be safe than sorry and spend those 15 minutes in the bathroom with them.
Good luck!

Hello M.,

My daughter will be 4 and I still hover over her for about 75% of her bath time. I will run to get her towel or grab the phone or pull something out of the oven etc. but am in there with her the bulk of the time. I started leaving her for mini boughts of time when she was about 2 - 1/2. My trick was to tell her to sing a song very loud for me that way I knew if she was singing she was not sticking her head in the water and it kept her focused on singing instead of making a mess and I could hear her. Hope this helps!

i think this applies to how confient you are woth him being in there. can he holler for you if need be? can he stand up in the water without assistance? can he get out by himself without balance issues?or will he wait for you to come get him because he knows he can;t get out on his own? if he can do those things i believe you both may be ready. my 4 year old was ready at 2 for me to be in the next room. but to each her own. each child is different so i think if he can do the things i mentioned he should be alright. good lluck

I wouldn't do it with a child that young. My daughter is 4 now and I will just now let her stay in there and put clothes away in her room across the hall. Like you said, I can hear her and she never stops talking (EVER! Ugh, girls!), so I am comfortable with that. However, she also knows how to swim. My son will be two in a couple of weeks and I am not anywhere near comfortable leaving him in there by himself. I would wait at least another year or two if I were you. They could stand up in the tub and slip and fall. You just don't know what can happen and I would rather be safe than sorry. I know it's painful to have to sit there through bathtime, but it's worth it to be sure they are safe.

Updated

I wouldn't do it with a child that young. My daughter is 4 now and I will just now let her stay in there and put clothes away in her room across the hall. Like you said, I can hear her and she never stops talking (EVER! Ugh, girls!), so I am comfortable with that. However, she also knows how to swim. My son will be two in a couple of weeks and I am not anywhere near comfortable leaving him in there by himself. I would wait at least another year or two if I were you. They could stand up in the tub and slip and fall. You just don't know what can happen and I would rather be safe than sorry. I know it's painful to have to sit there through bathtime, but it's worth it to be sure they are safe.

I have heard like age 4 to 5 being about right to be alone. I think we let ours be in the shower alone before then too.

M.

I didn't leave my kids alone until age 6. I have 5 kids...

I wouldn't leave him alone yet. When they can swim well, and still stay within ear shot because if they stand up, fall and hit their head.........

My daughter is 3 1/2 and she takes baths alone. We leave the door open and I can hear her talking, splashing and playing the whole time. If she goes quiet, for even a second, I run and check on her. I'm never more than 6 ft from the door. She's very responsible and doesn't stand up or play with the faucets. She just started playing in the tub alone about a month ago. She likes to have a little alone time and I can't say that I blame her! There's not more than a few inches of water in the tub. Just enough for her to float her boats and ducks.

I think 25 months might still be a bit too young. A friend of mine just told me about a mom she knew who just lost her 2 yr old from drowning in a tub. It just takes a nanosecond for them to fall under and breath in that water. It's just not worth the risk.

I just started letting my boys bath alone without me in the room or in the very next room, they are 4 and 6. I would say around 4, but even then they could slip and hit their head, so I would still stay close and check on them whenever it goes quiet.

M.-

My daughter is 2.5 years old and I occasionally leave her in the tub alone when I go into another room to tend to her brother, put him in bed, and have even nursed him in another room. I make sure that I can hear her talking - not just splashing or moving around. If she goes quiet for a few seconds, I yell her name or ask her a question. She does not turn on the water. She is very good about getting out of the tub without falling. She does not pour water out of the tub.

That being said, it's usually during the last 5-10 minutes of her bath, after I have sat with she and her 8 month old brother and have taken him out and am ready to get her out.

Don't do it...too risky I know sometimes it seems like they will be OK but as you can see by the posts you never know what can happen with a blink of an eye.

I know a 2yr old that died when M. just went to use the restroom and left her unattended thinking the same way you did. They are wayyy too busy for that. You don't want to risk that, best you let them waddle while you watch, then dry them up and get them out

When they learn how to swim.

My kids (3, 5, & 6) have been taking baths for a while without us in the room the whole time. I think we started doing it when they were around 2, but they also weren't really alone cause they took baths (usually 2 of them) together until just a 2 months ago. Now they fight to much to be in such a small space. But we do check in on them often & are able to hear them no matter where we are in the house.

But it's just something you as a mom have to figure out for yourself. It took longer for me to let my 5 yr old be alone then the others, but he is also a bit delayed in his development. Sometimes things that work good for one - doesn't work for another.

Between 6 and 8 depending on maturity of the child. It's not just slips and falls and accidents. Sometimes they start looking for other 'toys' to use in the bath tub. I was 5 when I shaved off my sisters eye brows (she was 3). Another time I almost used up a whole bottle of shampoo thinking it was the same as bubble bath. My son wasn't that bad, but I had to keep an eye on him to keep him from flooding out the bathroom floor. I don't care how water proof your bathroom is, it's just not good to have to mop up a flood every night.

I wouldn't suggest leaving them alone until you can carry on a conversation with them while you are in the other room. If they are talking to you then you know they are still doing ok. I wouldn't suggest leaving a 25 month old alone just yet. The HOT vs. COLD water is an issue too!

I see you already responded and there is pretty much a consensus, but I figured I would tell you what I plan to do with mine (2 1/2 now). When he can shower by himself, he can be alone. You can hear if they slip and fall, you can't hear if they are drowning. That is pretty much what my mom did with us. My sister is quite a bit younger and I do remember taking baths with her without my mom in there the whole time, but I was old enough to watch her and keep her from standing up. In the past few weeks I have started running (literally) to let the dogs out and run back the bathroom, but that is it. 30 seconds out of the room, maybe even less than that. Maybe when he is 4 or 5 I will feel comfortable enough to go use the other bathroom. But maybe not after reading some of these stories.

Also, I don't think swimming has anything to do with bathtub drowning. You aren't swimming in a tub, they are not even remotely close to the same thing. Besides, I won't be letting my kids play in a pool alone once they know how to swim.