Kid's Birthday Party Etiquette

Updated on September 29, 2011
C.S. asks from San Diego, CA
17 answers

I have a question. My dd who is 3 year old is invited to a birthday party of a fellow pre-schooler. Should both me and my husband go with her or should only 1 parent go? She is our only one so we don't have any other children to take care of.

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So What Happened?

Thank you all for the quick responses. My husband is ok to go with me. I guess we both will go. Will RSVP soon.

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K.L.

answers from Savannah on

If it were my party and the facility was limiting the number of adults, than I would write that on the invitation. I wouldn't see any problem with both of you attending. However, there is no harm in asking.

3 moms found this helpful
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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

It is, up to what the invitation states.
At this age, parties are usually with the parent there.
But due to the Host and their 'budget' some will state that "one" parent and the invited child, is invited.
Or if any other siblings/adults can attend.

Typically, you would ask the Host of the party.

1 mom found this helpful

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J.C.

answers from San Francisco on

I think many people are misunderstanding your question. The issue is not whether you can drop off your child at the party and not stay nor did the invite say parents are not welcome to escort the child. You're merely asking if both you and your husband should go. In my opinion, I think you can both go. I've remember this very often being the case when the children are younger. As the kids get older, 5 yrs old perhaps, I noticed that many parents do drop off or just one will stay.

2 moms found this helpful

G.T.

answers from Redding on

I think you can both go, why not? Probably gonna be more moms than dads, but if your husband wants to attend I'm sure that it's fine. The other gals will be envious that you have a hands on dad in tow.

2 moms found this helpful

T.C.

answers from Austin on

In my experience, it was mostly the moms that would go to pre-k parties(maybe because some of them were on weekdays). There were more dads or both parents at the "event" parties like pizza, minigolf, or bounce places. Even if the host has to pay extra for more adults(instead of by the number of children or by the hour), having more adults to supervise is still a plus.

1 mom found this helpful
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C.R.

answers from Birmingham on

If you all want to go, I would RSVP for one child and two adults. Sounds like they are inviting the parents if they say "parents and kids can use the facilities."

1 mom found this helpful
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K.P.

answers from New York on

I usually go with our son and just observationally the dads don't usually attend! At my son's party (3rd)- we had it at a local zoo- more "families" than just "moms", but we invited each child along with their family.

Either way is fine!

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D.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

I would do what is best for you and your family. Do you want to be together? Does one of you need a few hours to catch up on other things? There are no hard fast rules to birthday party invites. When I was a kid we got dropped off and picked up for birthday parties! Just have fun!!!
Best,
Andrea

C.M.

answers from Washington DC on

I would just ask to make sure. For our parties, the more the better!

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T.A.

answers from Los Angeles on

Usually both my husband and I go, unless one of us has previous plans. The weekends are valuable family time. I always include the whole family when we plan parties - but we don't invite a ton of kids, either.

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S.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

My daughters in her 2nd year of pre-school. Usually there is only one parent at the parties (dad or mom, I've seen a mix of both) but there is at least one family in her class where both parents always come. I think it's kinda sweet actually. My hubby would only do "party duty" if there was absolutely no way around it.
My mom (grandma) has taken my daughter to a couple of these as well, when people have them on Friday afternoons (I work). So I think it's "anything goes" at least in my community :)

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J.L.

answers from Chicago on

It is up to you. There have been times where my husband was the only parent attending and vice versa. We've also both attended to. So if you and your husband want to go there is nothing wrong with that especially since three is very young.

S.F.

answers from Los Angeles on

If you know, or would like to know, the parents, then both of you should come. Be prepared to help the parents with all the kids and the party staging. If you are just hoping your children will be friends, or your dd will have a good time, then only one parent should come.

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R.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

Only 1 should go just to accompany her. Actually only she is invited.

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B.C.

answers from Tampa on

If both parents are available to attend, then they usually both go. It also helps to totatate to supervise your 3 year old, so the other parent can socialize and eat. Please remember to RSVP. have a great time!!!

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K.E.

answers from Buffalo on

When I invite a child I expect a minimal of 1 parent to attend (exp. in swimming parties) when they call to RSVP I hope to get a full head count so I have enough food and or goodie bags for the kids, so RSVP and let the childs parents know you both would like to attend if that is ok. Then when I go to parties I try to figure out the expense per person that the party is costing the parents of the child then I make sure my gift covers minumally that amount. Eg. I never go to a party and giive a gift for less than $30 , if I aminvited to eat then I give a $40 gift, if hubby and all my kids come, eat etc. I give more.

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H.P.

answers from Houston on

I don't understand how this could possibly be an issue. How could anyone tell a parent that he/she is not welcome to escort the child to a party? If they don't have enough food, you don't have to eat. You can determine that once you get there.

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