I'm Not Ready to Wean Him!

Could you use a laugh about this issue? One of mine was a real nipple-chewer for a while. It was quite painful but I stuck it out. My family is mixed-race - dad is black, I am white - and he is vegetarian. When I remarked that the baby was getting some blood with food and it would be her first red meat, my husband replied, not from you, it wouldn't!!!

Keep plugging; the pain goes away and it's totally worth it.

C.:

when he bites, stop bf.... wait.....

try some calendula on the cuts... ( nipple cream by MotherLove)

this too will pass.

P., RLC, IBCLC
Breastfeeding and Parenting Solutions

This is from the La Leche League website:

What Should I Do If My Baby Bites Me?
Note: Please know that we are aware that babies come in two equally wonderful genders. For clarity, we are referring to your baby as "he" because mother is most certainly "she."

A bite from your baby can be truly painful, and worse, it keeps you tense in the fear that it will happen again. It's hard to relax and enjoy breastfeeding when your baby has bitten you. Babies who bite are seldom asking to be weaned. There are many reasons for a baby's biting, but the most common one is teething. Sometimes babies bite before their first teeth come in, but usually it's after the front teeth are in and the others are working their way down those hot, sore gums. Other reasons could be a cold or an ear infection (it's hard for your baby to swallow while breastfeeding if his nose is blocked), stress, or even a way of getting mother's undivided attention.

Here are some ideas to help reduce and eliminate biting. Remember: this may take persistence on your part. Your baby may not stop biting immediately but "this too shall pass."

When your baby is latched on correctly and nursing actively, getting milk from your breast and swallowing, it's physically impossible to bite. This is because your baby needs to stop sucking in order to bite. When latched on properly and nursing, your nipple is far back in your baby's mouth. In order to bite your baby has to adjust his tongue and allow your nipple to slide forward towards his teeth. So, as a first "hint" of when your baby is about to bite, try and watch for a moment--usually after the initial hunger has been satisfied--when your nipple slips forward in your baby's mouth. Often the tension in your baby's jaw will change just before this happens.
As soon as you notice this change, slip your finger into the corner of your baby's mouth, between his teeth, and let the nipple come out all the while keeping your finger in your baby's mouth to protect your nipple. Pulling your baby straight off is a very natural and almost automatic response, but it may cause soreness on your nipple.
Baby's position is important, and that means helping your baby stay in a close breastfeeding position, so that he doesn't or can't pull off very easily. If your baby has to strain to latch on, then he will come off and chew the nipple easily. Therefore, another response to biting that some mothers have found useful is to pull baby in closer to the breast, at least momentarily. If your baby begins to position himself away from your nipple, be alert for a possible bite.
When the cause of the problem is a cold, a more upright position can help your baby to breathe easier. Check with your baby's health care provider for suggestions to relieve stuffiness. Your baby may breastfeed better if you offer the breast while walking.
Sometimes older babies with teeth leave a "ring" of teethmarks after breastfeeding. Generally this is not painful and is caused by the teeth resting on the breast during breastfeeding. However, your baby may be clenching or sliding to the end of the nipple. If this is uncomfortable, use some of the same techniques listed in this FAQ to encourage your baby to gently latch on and breastfeed.

Maybe your baby is too young to understand exactly what you say, but your tone and attitude do convey meaning. It's worth trying to tell your baby, even repeatedly, that biting hurts and that he cannot bite you. Some alternatives mothers have used include:

Offer a teething ring and say, "Mommy is not for biting. You can bite this."
Use positive reinforcement. Praise your baby when he breastfeeds without biting. A hug or an extra cuddle will convey an important message.
Allow your baby to choose when to breastfeed. If baby is distracted and pulling off frequently, either try breastfeeding in a darkened room or begin a new activity with baby.
As you help your baby to learn good breastfeeding manners, attend a La Leche League Group meeting in your area for additional information and support. To find a Leader of a local Group, check out the section of our Web site about Finding a Local LLL Group.

My son also got his teeth early. I had to stop at for months because he came very close to biting one off! - (not really, but it was bleeding and it felt like it was going to fall off! LOL)I was so depressed after I stopped. But he seemed to adjust fine. He didn't have any problem taking the bottle. But it was me that was hearbroken over the situation. I know what you are going through. But in the end you have to decide whether the pain is great enough to quit or if you can endure it. Chances are if he's a bitter, it wont get any better.
My son is now almost 4 & doing great - he is also autistic. feel free to email me if you need any additional support. I know how heartwrenching it is to stop when your not ready.
A.

Call the hospital and ask for the number to LaLeacha (? - I cannot recall the spelling) maybe you can even check on line. They are the breast feeding specialists and help with all sorts of special issues and problems in general. It has been 12 years since I've had to breastfeed, perhaps there is some sort of shield available, for your protection or some option for you. Don't give up without exhausting your options, hopefully there is an answer out there for you. I wish you the best, your milk is the perfect blend for him and I commend your efforts to prolong it as long as you can.
L.

Get yourself a breastpump, manual are around $10, and pump. He still gets breastmilk and you save yourself from the pain.

You're right- pain is pain. I nursed my son until 15 months and am still nursing my daughter at 8 months. I got bit with both of them once teeth started coming in and was able to work through it. When they bit me, I'd take my nipple out of their mouth and tell them sternly, "No biting." Of course, they were too young to really understand, but they got the picture- food taken away and an unpleasant tone. My daughter sometimes likes to chomp down and pull. I end up gently pushing in the soft spot of her cheek to get her to release. It usually upsets her, but she's quickly learning that hurting mommy gets the food taken away. Good luck!

I fully support your desire to continue that beautiful bond and unmatched nourishment for you son... I also understand the ouch... Does he actually bite or is it just rubbing? For me, the rubbing eventually toughened me up, but when either of my girls bit me they were immediately (gently yet firmly) removed from my breast and not allowed back for at least 5 minutes or so. I did this consistently and it seemed to work very quickly. If the suction is strong you can slip your finger in one corner of their mouth to break the seal before you remove the child.

Good luck Mama!

My son & daughter both bit me for fun. I think they each did it once or twice. I unlatched and said no almost at a yelling tone. This upset them enough to remember biting is not fun. My two year old daughter is nursing as I type this, so we obviously got through it with no more biting. Good luck! You are a great mom for nursing with so much going on in your household.

Hi! I actually pump all of my breast milk for my 4 month old. He was premature & in the hospital for a month so I had to do it this way, and after he got home has just never gotten used to taking it from the breast. You may want to try this. It might be hard with 2 kids though. Good Luck no matter what you do.

Have you tried a breast shield? Another thing is, you might try GENTLY smacking or pinching the bottom of his foot and say, "no", when he bites--nothing to hurt him, but to let him know that it isn't a good thing to bite Mommy. Hope this helps. Good luck.

Even if he laughs when you remove him and say no, he will eventually get the clue that if he bites, he will not get what he wants. It should just be a phase. As you are probably aware this is an easily distractable age and nursing is a bit of a challenge but this will pass. Use Lanolin to help your breasts and just keep removing him if you truly do want to keep nursing him. I don't see how the Zoloft should effect anything....you can keep taking it whether or not you continue nursing. I took it through nursing my first son and through my 2nd pregnancy and now I am taking it while nursing my second.

Why not just nurse and supplement if the problem is really bad? This way you have more time to "recuperate" between feedings?

Hi C.,

I'm with you--it's so painful when they bite! I had the same issue with my son (I wonder if it's more of a boy thing...). Anyway, I found that I had to really take him off every single time he bit. So, that ended up being each feeding over the course of 24 hours. It was a pain (literally), but after being consistent and saying no and taking him off, laying him in his crib, and walking away for about 10 minutes, he learned. He laughed, too, until he realized that this was happening each feeding...then he really didn't like it. So, if you have not yet tried the whole walking away thing, consistently, give it a shot. Also, as to allergies, I also get hayfever in the spring, and my doctor prescribed Nasacort...evidently, those nasal sprays stay localized in the nasal area and don't affect breastmilk. Flonase worked best on me, but it's pretty individual. Best of luck to you in this uncertain time!

hi C.,

It's been awhile, but I remember gently working my finger in to break the suction when getting bit (sometimes they can even do it without teeth!). As the others mentioned, they get the message somehow. There are shields and creams out there to help (I remember how much that hurts, it's really painful). Be sure to ask your doctor or reach out to other BF moms until you find something that brings you comfort.

Otherwise, if you decide to switch to formula don't feel too guilty. Your baby has received the important stuff in the first few weeks.

I was only able to BF for a few weeks with my youngest, being an older Mom I just didn't have the milk supply and I felt so bad about it - she is a very healthy preschooler now!

:-)

W.

Weaning for the last time was very difficult for me so I can relate. Maybe you could change positions with him. I learned to stimulate his top lip not his bottom lip and my baby latched on at a better position. If your breast is at his nose level and you stimulate his top lip he has to reach up for it and opens wider. Then the "little fang" is in a less sensitive spot. Another idea, when he seems to be falling asleep have your finger ready to unlatch before he clamps down.

As a breastfeeding mother here's my advice.

Don't stop breastfeeding as long as you can stand the teeth. If they are too much, then pump out your milk and bottle feed him.

You won't lose the bond. I breastfed my son up until 6 months and then pumped as long as I could and gave him the bottle. He was fine.

I am currently breastfeeding my 3 mo. old daughter and I think she will be getting teeth soon. So if I can deal with it, I will nurse her. If not, I will pump out my milk for her.

Breast milk is the best. It's normal to breastfeed the first year and then go to cow's milk or formula. I wasn't able to produce enough for my son, so had to put him on formula at 7 months til he was a year. And formula is VERY expensive...so again a benefit of breastfeeding as long as possible.

Hope this helps, good luck.

Hi Sorry to hear about the biting, it is definitely not fun. My ODS bit me once and I wasnt expecting it and gasped out loud. He unlatched and immediately started to cry. He never bite me again. My YDS used to bite all the time especially when he had a new tooth coming. I really dont have any advice other than it didnt happen all the time and he would stop after I guess the pain didnt bother him anymore. Also I wanted to say that sometimes babies who BF and have GERD do better when mom eliminates dairy from her diet.

I hope you can stick it out alittle longer and maybe someone does have some good advice.

Hi C.,
I know where you are coming from. I have been on the receiving end of those new baby teeth and there is nothing pleasant about it.

What I did was un-lach him, say no and tap him (sometimes harder than others) on the cheek and sometimes I would have to put him down and walk away. I have a very sensitive little boy, so he got the hint pretty quickly. With the bottom teeth, if he's biting, he's not eating, because his tongue will be over his teeth when he's eating. Obviously you know this since you nursed your daughter for so long, I just wanted to throw that part out there.

I would try to be more stern about him scraping or biting. Seriously, walk away if you have to. If he's really hungry, he'll get it.

Hugs to you. I completely understand not wanting to wean. Not sure if we will have more and I am still nursing my 18 month old.
B.

C., Have you thought of pumping and giving the baby a bottle of your milk? That's what I did when mine started to teeth an then started to bite. That way I could feed them my milk for as long as I wanted without the pain of the biting. This may give the baby time to adjust to the bottle and be ready for formula if you have to change your medication.

Have you tried pumping your milk and feeding him that way. I understand about the biting; mine is seven and I still remember the biting!
K.

Hi C.! Unfortunately I don't have any good advice about weaning your son as I was unable to breast feed my little girl because she wouldn't latch on correctly so I pumped for about four months. Have you considered pumping? I could only imagine how much that little tooth would hurt!!

Your question about Zoloft caught my eye though as I have been on the generic also for about two years now. We're getting ready to try for baby #2 and I was wondering if you took Zoloft while pregnant? My doctor told me it was safe, but that we'd lower my dosage, so I was just curious about your experience with it.

Thanks!
Tara

Dear C.,

I nursed my son for 3 1/2 years (he is now 13!). He was biting me BEFORE his teeth came out. What I found worked for us was not giving him any giggles. Instead, his "ummies" got taken away until he stopped. Literally, that was what worked. You bite, no nursing. Stop biting, you can nurse.

If you haven't already contacted your local La Leche League for support, you may want to do that. The national organization has a LOT of information and research into breastfeeding and what concerns there might be about what is safe to take and what is not while breastfeeding.

Good Luck,

C.

I had to wean my son at 4 months even though I did not want to. He was then a soy formula for 2 months. At 6 months our Doctor, who is a DO, gave us the go a head to start regular milk. My son is now 17 years old over 6' tall and very healthy. He still drinks about 3 gallons of skim milk a week.

It may have broke my heart to wean him but I look at him now and and smile.

Good Luck

I nursed my oldest no problems until she was a year old because she didn't get her first tooth until she was 11 months old.

The second daughter was a different story. She got her first tooth at seven months old and gnawed everything. She's three now and getting a molar and still wants to gnaw on toys. Her crib has tooth marks all up and down the front part like a beaver got after it....

Anyway, she bit me when that first little tooth came in and I had a scab and stayed sore for about two weeks. I had to put lanolin on it all the time and even noticed blood in her stools at one point and realized that she was ingesting quite a bit of blood with her mommy's milk. It would have freaked me out but I have a sister-in-law that went through that and had already warned me.

At any rate, the first time she did it I very sternly with a slightly raised voice told her NO!!!. It kinda scared her and she cried a bit. The second time she went to bite down I did the same thing and then used my finger to pop her off. She cried for a bit, but she never bit me again. Problem is with her nursing all the time it took two weeks to heal...and boy was that painful. The burning, the stinging, yikes!!!! It did heal though. Lots of lanolin and tried to keep it dry so it would heal.

Stick it out if you can and it will heal. Don't worry about that. If it is too painful try nursing him on the one breast and then just pumping off the one that hurts the most until hit heals.

Good luck!!!

In my experience with my daughter I found that when she bit, I had to remove her without any emotion whatsoever. It is REALLY hard to do, obviously, but I realized that she was just trying to get a reaction.

When getting ready to nurse I just had to steel myself, knowing a bite would probably happen, and if it did, I did my best not to yelp, raise my voice, or act upset in any way...I just removed her and waited. If I said no, it was in a very matter-of-fact and calm tone.

When she got no reaction, she stopped pretty quicky.

This was sort of a prelude for me for the next stages - She is 4 now and I still find that a dispassionate response ends bad behavior much better than a big reaction.

I had to stop nursing early also but believe me I was stubborn until my breast was raw and bleeding. It happens faster than you think. You bond has formed when you started nursing. You'll never loose that. Speak to dr. about the zoloft and get on the formula. Or, you can pump for a while to get him use to the bottle....he'll love having your milk in the bottle. Good luck mommy. Your ouchies will go away and he won't notice the tenseness in you when that pain occurs.