So recently I was at a silent auction for a charity event at my mother's church. There was nice guitar there and I was bidding on it. I didn't end up winning the bid, but that's life. Well a couple was there that I knew when I went to church there. The guy came up to me and told me that if I didn't win the bid, he had a guitar he would give me. I said that was great, I was really excited. So the next week he sent it to me by way of my mother. I was on the phone with him thanking him for the guitar and he then said he was giving it to me on the stipulation that I use it or return it to him, that I never sell it. Well, I didn't like that too much. I mean, a gift is a gift, I didn't ask him to give me a valuable guitar. I talked it over with my husband and he said I should still take it since I don't plan to sell it, don't pass up on getting a nice guitar. So I said Ok. Now I am wondering if that was a great decision. My mom just sent me a text asking if I got a chance to call him to tell him she brought me the guitar, um..no. Why would I? I called him, thanked him, done in my book. Then I started thinking about it. I have tinkered on the guitar but don't play by any means. I wanted a guitar as a life investment, but I probably won't get deep into right now, I am pregs with my third child and busy! I mean I get it out and mess around here and there and I love it, but I don't have time for lessons and dedication at the moment. I don't want to be harassed every time I bump into him as to whether or not I am playing. I don't want him hassling my mom about it. Granted, I only see him maybe once a year, maybe less...but still. I kind of feel like I was given something that doesn't really belong to me. Would you keep something given to you in this way or would you return it and thank the person for their thoughtfulness but tell them you think it would be better if it were to stay with them? Thanks!
Just as an FYI, I will actually learn to play it, just not right this second ;) I am a musician and a singer, minored in music in college etc, so not actually a novice when it comes to music etc. Just wasn't sure if he really was ok with me having it after all....good stuff to think on...thanks ladies ;) oh and also, I have no intention of selling the guitar, he did say he would loan it to me for the rest of my life but if I wanted to get rid of it, he wanted it back....hmmm...still thinkin' on it....
I don't think he meant you have to play it ALL the time or even semi-professionally. I think he meant he didn't want you to shove it in a closet or sell it.
I think you're making too big a deal out of this. He gave you a guitar for free. He just didn't want you to sell it. If you only see him once a year, he's not going to hound you about it.
But if it bothers you that much, give it back.
i think the man has very good intentions. he gave you a gift to "use" as you please but if you decide to no longer use it (meaning sell it) then rather than allowing it to go to another home, allow it to come back to him. Apparently he has value in the guitar, and in turn you, for passing it to you. be grateful and use it as you may.... just dont get rid of it. and if you only see him once a year, even if he ask you about it every time he sees you, you can hardly call that harassment....
What kind of guitar is it? How old is it? If you go to my profile and look at my picture, I am holding a guitar. That guitar is a 1959 Gibson 345, it belongs to a friend of mine, if you look closely at the bottom right of the picture you can see his foot in the photo. I had known him for 27 yrs when that picture was taken and that was the first time I was allowed to touch his guitar. And I roadie for the band. No one touches his guitar.
Why you may ask ***** it's worth $20,000****
Old guitars are worth a lot of money, treasure it. This man did you an enormus favor by giving you his guitar.
My husband "gave" his niece to use for her lessons but said when she was done with it, he'd like it back. She had it for years--he didn't care how long she had it/used it.
I'd say when you get a guitar of your own, return it.
It was still a nice gesture on his part. No O. forced you to take it.
He values the guitar, be it sentimental or monitary. He may have chosen to give it to you because you seem to have a passion for learning to play. He wanted to encourage your interest. Maybe no one else has expressed an interest in his guitar. Because it takes hard work and a diligent effort to learn to play well, so many lay it down and never pick it back up. He would like to have the opportunity to find a happy home for it and encourage another. If you can't see his gesture as a positive gesture, I would return it to him saying that it was very kind of him to encourage you to play, but you do not have the time now and it may be several years before you can venture into a new creative path. My father gave me an antique violin to encourage my play and if I was not to make an effort to learn, he could inspire one of my 4 brothers and sisters, or his
12 grandchildren to play. It was all completely well-intentioned.
I did keep it. Good luck.
I read this post and said "wow i'm that guy." lol.
I give stuff to people all the time with the stipulation that they have to either keep it, or give it back. Some of the things aren't valuable, but sentimental. If they sell it I am loosing that, and can find another friend to give it to, or just hang on to it.
Granted a lot of the stuff I give is "do what you want with it" items and could care less if I ever see them again.
You're mom probably wants you to call him to let him know she gave it to him to let him know she did what was asked and that you actually recieved what he gave you with no problems. It's just a courtesy call.
If you don't like it give it back, but personally it sounds like you're making a mountain out of a mole hill. Not trying to be rude by any means so I hope you don't take it that way.
Good Luck.
If the guy really wanted the guitar for himself, he should have just kept it - it was nice of him to offer it to you, but once someone gives a gift, it's up to the recipient to do as they please.
There's nothing wrong with holding onto the guitar for a time when you will have more time to take lessons and learn to play it. If he asks you or your mom about it, just tell him how much you really appreciate his generosity and you are enjoying it when you can. Or you can just be honest and tell him you don't have as much time for it as you thought you did and let him know you are not planning to give it away, but ask him if he would like it back instead.
I would just return it to him. Be gracious. I would feel awkward about the situation also. I think I would also include a white lie. Say you just a guitar at a garage that needed some work but you could not pass up such a great deal. Make it short and sweet. I have three kids myself so I understand about being busy.
You should probably just give it back to him. If you want to tinker around with a guitar on your own time, working with your own schedule, you can easily purchase a student guitar for just over $100. After that, if you decide that you want to take more of a serious interest in learning play, then you can always upgrade to a more expensive guitar.
I think this guy's intentions were good. He probably didn't want you to accept the guitar only to allow it to sit around collecting dust or possibly turning around and either selling it to someone else (and making a profit off of it) or giving it to someone that he doesn't know. Sounds like, for him, the guitar was a generous gift and he wants to give it to you because he thinks you would use it, not profit off of it.
Since you are not serious about playing right now and you do mention that you are looking for an "investment" guitar, I think you should give it back to him. Clearly the spirit in which he is giving you the guitar is not in alignment with why you wanted to purchase a guitar. Best to return it and look elsewhere for your investment. It's not worth possibly jeopardizing a friendship over.
Just my 2-cents.
The minute he said he wanted it back when I was done with it I would have returned it. What if something happened, if it got damaged in some way? I would just give it back and start saving towards one that would really be mine.
No, uless it is in the family and we want to keep it in the family.
I wouldn't make such a big deal about it. How nice of him to give you something of such value to him. Just play it when you can. It must be getting more use than when it was sitting around at his house. Enjoy the gift as well as the good intentions of the giver. If you ever realize that you are not going to play it, then return it so he can enjoy giving someone else a nice gift. If you ever see him, tell him how much fun it is to tinker around on it. He just doesn't want to think it is sitting in a closet if he knew someone else could use it. View it as a very special gift, not a ball and chain.
