Early Stages of Miscarriage

Updated on April 07, 2011
K.N. asks from Noblesville, IN
21 answers

I am in the early stages of a miscarriage and am not sure whether I should wait it out or is it better to have a D&C. With the holidays coming up I don't want to feel bad, but am not sure if a D&C is the way to go either. Any advice would be greatly appreiciated.

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So What Happened?

Thanks everyone. You have helped me out tremendously. I talk to my doctor tommarrow to see what we should do.

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S.H.

answers from Indianapolis on

If it were me I would contact my OB asap. It might not be what you think. Plus I would rather "have it over with" if need be. I am so sorry.

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M.O.

answers from Chicago on

I miscarried in early November. I opted to do it naturally and did pass the baby. I felt I had some closure after that because I was able to say goodbye to my baby. I only bled for a few days like a reg period. I was only 6 weeks along. I think the further you are, the worse it can be.

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A.A.

answers from Indianapolis on

I'm so sorry for you--I can't really give you any advice, but I'm sorry that you have to go through with this during the holidays. Lean on you rhusband and your little one--sounds like you have a lot going with them.

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T.M.

answers from Terre Haute on

I am soooo sorry! Reading your request brought tears to my eyes. I understand completly because I went through it too. I lost my first child to a miscarriage. I was due Dec. 23, 1996. I was 5 months into my pregnancy but I'm told that my child did not develop beyond the 3rd month. The final decision is of course yours because you have to live with it. I will however tell you how things went for me. I didn't have a choice about the D&C. I was told very coldly about the death of my child. I chose to get a 2nd opinion (I had to hold on to some hope for a while.) Anyway, my sister was pregnant at the same time. She was due Jan. 24, 1997. Her child was born without incident. It was very difficult to watch someone going through all the changes that I knew I should be experiencing but I made it. I stayed involved and I am close to my niece today. No matter which road you decide to take, that child that you carry will always be in your heart. You will think of them often. The pain will ease some but for me the emptiness never did. I think the D&C is the most humane thing to do for yourself. This experience is traumatic enough without the added pain and sickness. After my d&c, I just felt numb for a while. No emotions really or anything. Nothing I could express anyway. I think this is probably normal to a point.
Once again, I am so sorry. I would love to talk to you more if you need the support from someone that has walked that mile. I'm really sorry that you're walking in my shoes. Good luck to you. Shannon
Ps. Something that has brought a measure of comfort to me over the years is the 1 ultrasound picture I have of my baby. It was during this ultrasound that I was told my child was no longer living. I think the picture just gives me something concrete to add to my photos and honor the memory of my baby.

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L.B.

answers from Burlington on

hi ,
first of all I am terribly sorry for your loss....I just got out of the hospital 2 days ago.Saturday I woke up at 6:00am gushing of blood, I was 9 weeks pregnant and as far as I knew everything was going well.....I was rushed to ER and had 3 seizures during the whole process because of all the blood loss....I had a blood transfusion as my body lost way to much blood....I am really scared and want to have a another baby..I do have a healthy 10 month baby boy but after what happened I don't know if I can still have babies...has anyone gone through this? Please let me know if anyone has experienced this.

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C.N.

answers from Chicago on

The doc told me to get a d&c so I didn't hemorage(sorry bad spelling). I liked the fact that it was done and over with so I could move on. I think if I hadn't done the d&c I would have spent a lot of time agonizing over the loss.

I am sorry about your loss. It is devastating but for me I changed my focus so that I could find ways to get stronger and not letting it consume me.

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K.

answers from Chicago on

I'm so sorry for your loss :( ! From what I've read I think it's ok to just let it pass on its own, but I might contact your doc and make an appointment for a week from now just to make sure everything is out.

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H.E.

answers from Chicago on

I am so sorry for your miscarriage. I went through the same thing the second week of October at 10 weeks. My doctor offered the D&C and I went in the next day after my ultrasound. It took me about 3-4 days to recover from the D&C. I didn't want to pass what I thought was my baby, so I thought the procedure was beneficial in that way. My ob told me she was glad she did it because there was a lot left that she took out. It helped with the healing process and to be honest helped me move on. It was not painful and I was in and out of the hospital in 3hrs. I did have soreness and cramping for a few days after, but not as bad compared to the miscarriage cramping. I would do it before the holidays, the sooner the better so you can try to enjoy them and not be cramping and bleeding. You will spot and bleed with the D&C too, but at least you'll have the worst of it already gone. God Bless and I'm so sorry for your loss, no one realizes how tough it is until they've gone through it!! Having two beautiful kids and a great husband gave me a lot to be thankful for, so think about all the good things you have and focus on the positive.....

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T.R.

answers from Chicago on

I am so sorry. I have had 2, one at 6 weeks and one at almost 9. I didn't have a D&C at 6 weeks and it was not too bad - like a heavy period. I wasn't going to have one at 9 weeks either, but all of a sudden, at 10:00 at night I started major heavy bleeding. My husband took me to the hospital and I had a D&C that night. It was totally no big deal and I felt absolutely fine afterwards. I can't imagine having to go through that kind of bleeding. Depending on how far along you are, I would say do the D&C. Plus, if this was a planned pregnancy, you can start trying sooner. Best of luck to you and I'm so sorry. One other thing, they can do tests on the embryo (is that what you call it at that stage) which could be helpful in the future.

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J.M.

answers from Elkhart on

K.,
My heart aches for you. I would think the best thing is to let your body act on it's own. I've heard of mothers who were told they were miscarrying only to have a miracle happen and go full term. Not to give false hope, but I just think it is always best to let 'nature' take it's course. I think the body heals better that way. Just my opinion. God bless you!

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R.L.

answers from Chicago on

I had a few miscarriages, and an ectopic where I lost a tube. After what I had been through, I felt a D&C was invasive, so the Doctor perscribed an herb/drug called methaquinn, which causes the uterus to contract and shed its contents. If you are at all interested, ask the doctor if you are a candidate for this. Good luck. BTW, I have a 2.5 year old, and am now pregnant with #2, so don't worry!
Good luck
R.

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T.S.

answers from Chicago on

K.,

I'm assuming that you've already confirmed the loss with your OB/GYN. I suffered 2 m/c's before having my first son. The first time it was very early on in the pregnancy (8 weeks) and the Dr. suggested letting my body take care of it. I was going for blood tests and the levels weren't dropping so I had a D & C. The second m/c was at about 11-12 weeks and I had to have the D & C since I was so far along. I couldn't WAIT to have it over with and begin my healing process (emotionally and physically).

So, it's really up to you and what you want to do. Discuss the options with your OB/GYN and decide from there.

I'm very sorry for your family's loss.

T.

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C.D.

answers from Chicago on

I am so sorry for your loss. I have had 2 miscarriages, and with the first one I almost died trying to miscarry naturally. I started bleeding and went in for an ultrasound and found out I lost the baby. I had an appt. with my doctor the next day to discuss it (she went on vacation that afternoon and somehow forgot about me??). I demanded to talk to the on call doctor and he told me to discuss a D&C with my doctor the next day, and that I should just pass it naturally until then. He did tell me if I was bleeding significantly- more than 1 pad per hour- to call him. Well, I woke up in the middle of the night and was in terrible grief. I wasn't paying too much attention, but I knew I was bleeding significantly. Well, by the time I went to go get my husband to call 911, it was almost too late. I stood up from the bathroom and my body started going into shock. I made it to my husband and he called 911, and to make a long story short they couldn't get a blood pressure on me and based on my pulse I should not have been coherent. They rushed my husband out of the room and told him this was very serious and they had to get me out to a hospital right away. They had to rush me to the nearest hospital (not one my doctor was at) and keep me there until I was stabilized enough to transfer to my doctor's hospital. They made sure they had enough blood there to do a transfusion if necessary. Luckily, I didn't need that and was stabilized enough to transfer 5 hours later, when I had the D&C. The D&C was done very quickly and it went very smoothly. I was home then in a few hours. So, I would just get the D&C done and that way you know everything is taken care of properly and you can somewhat enjoy the Holidays.

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A.P.

answers from Chicago on

Sorry to hear your sad news. I opted for the D&C. My doctor wanted me to "retrieve" the matter after I passed it, to make sure it all came out. I just didn't think I could do that. The D&C went smoothly, and recovery was nothing. I felt better just having it all taken care of quickly so we could move on.
Good luck!

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D.W.

answers from Chicago on

I would go ahead with DC because most of the times you will miscarriage naturally but everthing will not come out and you have to have DC anyways. It happened to me 2 times the last time I was schedule for DC at 11am and everything started happening about 8:30am and I still had to have DC anyways. I feel its better to go ahead and get it done. Think if you are in the house alone or at the store miscarriage happen fast my last one i spotted for sbout 2 weeks then right before everything started coming out I was down stair when i got up stairs things just fell out. I'm not trying to gross you out but sometimes you dont get a warning before the final stage.

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M.L.

answers from Fort Wayne on

I myself have never had one but being a member of a tubal reveral group I have learned quite abit about miscarriages. From what I have been told it is much better to wait it out and let your body miscarriage naturally. I am sorry about your loss.

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M.M.

answers from Chicago on

K., I'm very sorry for your loss. I had a miscarriage 5 years ago at 12 weeks. My doctor gave me the 2 options and I decided to have a D&C the next afternoon. Unfortunately, it should have been scheduled sooner because by the next morning I was in horrible pain, violently ill and bleeding terribly. In retrospect, I should have gone to the emergency room. By the time we got to the surgicenter I had passed out in the waiting room! It was a really horrible experience to go through. Depending on how far along you are, I would schedule a D&C and get it over with.

I've had a few other miscarriages, but they were so early on that it was just like having a period. Glad to say I'm done with all of that...I now have 2 beautiful adopted daughters from China!

Good luck to you.

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M.T.

answers from Chicago on

K.-

I am so sorry to hear this news...a friend of mine was in your position and she waited it out and when her body FINALLY decided to let go, she said it was horrible. She wished she would've had the d & c. She was super depressed and she felt if she would've had the d & c, she would've recovered emotionally faster.

I wish you the very best in 2008, again, so sorry you're having to go thru this.

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J.U.

answers from Chicago on

Hi,
I'm sorry you are going through this. When I was trying for my last child (ended up as twins) I did IVF four times. #2 worked and then I lost identical twins. I started to miscarry but scheduled a D&C so it would be over with so I could start to move on.

With IVF #3 I miscarried on my own at 6 weeks.

With the holidays coming up I would go for a D&C so you can start to move forward. That is just my opinion.

Hang in there.

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C.S.

answers from Chicago on

K.

First of all I am so sorry. I had a miscarriage at the end of August. I did it naturally and really was not as bad physically as I thought it would be. What is your DR suggesting? I concieved through fertility treatments so I was monitored very closely. I was given 2 weeks to miscarry naturally and then we would go from there. It happened about a week before I was suppose to back into see the DR to talk about the D&C. If your DR can monitor your PG levels and see that they are going down the way they are suppose to then I would say to give a natural miscarriage a chance. I would also recomend getting some pain meds from your DR if possible. My DR gave me vicodine which I did take when I knew for sure it was happening whic is probably why my miscarriage was not as physically as bad as I had expected. Good Luck to you.

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J.B.

answers from Chicago on

K., I'm so very sorry for your loss.

I had a miscarriage 2 years ago at 11 weeks. Initially I opted to do it naturally, I didn't want surgery. The next morning though, I hemorhaged at home. It was very scary, I was home alone with my 2 year old and had to try and get to a phone without scaring him. I ended up losing a lot of blood, had an emergency D&C and had blood pressure problems afterward.

I don't want to scare you. a miscarriage alone can be traumatic. just follow your heart, and make sure you have people around for support.

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