Cosleeping...

Congratulations on your pregnancy! So sorry about your loss this year too. I'm sure your instincts as a mom are very good but the loss, among other things... is a terrible blow to your confidence as a mom. I'm sure there is so much that you know about babies and raising them - as much as any other mom out here! And you keep asking good questions so don't think you are clueless. Those that are clueless are the ones that don't even know what to ask!

Regarding co-sleeping - sorry, don't know much about the nest. With both of my children, it was just a personal preference to have them in a bassinet in my room, early on, then move them to a crib. I guess that short walk to the crib helped me be a little more alert when it was time to take care of my baby in the middle of the night because I actually had to get up and do something, rather than having the baby next to me. And I could hear both of my children because our rooms were so close. I did like being in bed with my children from time to time, but it wasn't an everyday thing and I didn't want to give up that close time with my husband. Don't know if your husband may be changing shifts any time soon so it's something to think about. This is just my preference and may not work for you, though. All the best for you, this pregnancy - hope it goes smoothly for you!

Sorry about your loss -- I can see why you're concerned!

I would recommend grabbing a copy of the Dr Sears Baby Book or Sleep Book (you should find them at your library or bookstore). Good Nights by Dr Jay Gordon is another good resource on cosleeping.
Also check
http://www.attachmentparenting.org/principles/night.php
or
http://www.nd.edu/~jmckenn1/lab/

We used a First Years sleeper during the first couple months, but ditched it after a bit.

Hi K.!
I'm a huge fan of co-sleeping. I did it with both my boys. I always used the pad that inclined to prevent acid reflux as much as possible. Sometimes we used the nest sometimes we didn't. But the baby listened to you breath and felt your warmth for 9 months. If you are next to the baby sleeping, they will sleep the best! My husband and I both did chest to chest with the babies too and that put them to sleep instantly. Feeling your soft skin against theirs, feeling your heart and body heat. It's a great bonding tool.

I am so incredibly sorry for your loss...

I tried to use one of those in-bed "nests" and ended up dumping it a week later. I couldn't see my daughter over the top and so I couldn't sleep. We found it much easier just to have her in the bed with us.

I found having her there really really calmed my fears of SIDS. I lost a cousin this way. I was able to feel her moving.

Dr. Sears has some fantastic information on bed sharing. There has been some research that safe bed sharing actually lowers the risk of SIDS because your baby is more cued in to your breathing and gets moved a little at night which can help to prevent them from stopping breathing too. The bedsharing really helped us get a good start with breastfeeding and let me get a lot more rest as I didn't have to get out of bed to nurse.

Please make sure to get some help with the loss of your son now that you have another on the way. I can't imagine what you've been through- mama- but I'm sure that you are carrying some fear. I'm sending you good thoughts on your new little one.

I'm wishing you all the

The First Years makes one...we got ours at target. I was really nervous about having my little girl (now 4 wks old) in our bed, and it helped me get through the first couple weeks. I liked it because there is a hard shell that keeps my husband from rolling over. (I never really worried about myself.) And you can get one with a "sleep positioner" but I've never used mine. But, like the other mom who responded, we ditched it after a couple weeks. It was too crowded with the three of us. I used it to help transition her to the bassinet which is a little bigger, though, which worked well. And I do however still use it occasionally when my husband's not home, so maybe it would work for you. It also folds up nicely, so I take it with when we go visiting for her naps. Good luck!

I'm sorry for the loss of your son. I've read that those sleep positioners can actually be dangerous and suffocate babies. I've done a lot of reading on SIDS prevention and much of the literature recommends not using them.