Baby Shower Question - Dallas,TX

You don't have to do anything. You don't say how far along you are but from your profile, it looks like you're 8-9 weeks? Congrats! Anyway, someone will offer to host one and will get the ball rolling when you're about 6 months along. The actual shower will be about a month before you're due, assuming that you don't have to travel or have complications or other factors that would make something earlier make sense. You let whoever wants to host something for you do all of the planning, and give her input if/when she asks.

As the months move along and the ball gets rolling on planning, I would seriously re-think the idea of having 5 showers. I can't imagine a family scenario where that would be necessary - and I come from a complicated family - but more to the point, you are going to be EXHAUSTED. There's no way someone in her 3rd trimester can be a gracious, grateful guest of honor at five different events. So although you can't be involved in the planning or pick a hostess, you may want to plant the seed that not every warring faction gets to host a separate event and some of the guest lists will just have to be consolidated and people can decide on their own whether or not to come.

If I'm understanding correctly you are expecting your first baby...you dont ask anyone to host it, if you are expecting 5 then you know you have plenty of family/friends that will be thrilled to have you a baby shower. If your close friend or family member is hosting you one and shares that with you I think it would be ok to express ideas or themes that you would love to see, but dont be disappointed if they dont, and keep them within their means. My aunt was the baby shower version of bridezilla wanting to know all the details and who exactly was going...dont do that! lol They may ask you for a list of guest you would like to invite and ask them how many people they plan on hosting so you can be courteous to their capacity. Have fun!

Good Morning K.!

First off, you don't pick a hostess, one will decide if/when she wants to have a shower for you. Hopefully you have a close friend or family member that will host for you, otherwise, I think it's just too tacky to host your own. If multiple people ask (who would all be invited to the same shower), maybe suggest that they co-host the event.

Second, I wouldn't really tell them what you want or don't want. Unless it is something imperative (i.e. you can't eat peanuts, don't like lemonade, etc.) I would let most of the ideas come from them. Give them a list of people to invite, and let them have fun with it. I didn't plan either of my showers last time, and they were both lovely.

As for telling them what you want, that is why you register. Some people will still buy you what they want to get you, but the register should give people an idea of what you are looking for. Once you register, that same registry can be used for more than one shower.

Finally, don't expect a shower until about a month or so before your due date. Most women don't have one until right before baby comes. Hope this helps!

Congratualtions! Just sit back and let the hostess come to you and be very gracious and grateful for the thought and effort. Let them take the lead and if you are having multiple showers, please make sure not to double up on the invite list. That would get too expensive for your guests. Mom or sisters might want to come to all, but let them know they don't need to buy you a gift at every shower. It is also a nice gesture for you to give the hostesses a thankyou gift.

As far as the gifts you need, that is why you register. It makes it so much easier for the guests and yourself. If you have out of town guests, make sure you register at stores they would have access to such as Target, etc.

Have fun!!

First, the hostess decides or offers to throw you the shower. Typically a close friend or family member will be the hostess (or co-hostess). If you have sisters or sisters-in-law and a friend wants to do it, they talk to the sisters (or SIL) first to see if they want to do it and want help or if they would prefer to help the friend. Unless it is a surprise shower, the hostess will normally get your input so if they haven't asked, let a few key people know important things (all female or co-ed, where you have registered, if you know what the sex of the baby is or need to go gender neutral, and maybe you "hate pink" and are having girl so you want them to avoid as much pink as possible or vice versa with a boy and blue).

There is also no need to have 5 showers. The shower is for you and the baby and therefore the whole family should come together for the occassion.

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I don't know the official ettiquette but can tell you what I would do. I would consider the ocassion a gift. you can't really "ask" for it or dictate much about a gift, other than what is asked or obvious things, such as "Aunt Sally has been invited to the last four and I'm not sure it is appropriate to invite her again....." or "I'm allergic to walnuts so can we revise the dessert menu?" Let whomever gives you a shower take the lead. They probably will ask a lot of questions to make sure it is a fun event for you.
Take care, T.

I am also not sure of formal etiquette. I know my sister-in-law asked my younger sister if she wanted to co-host a shower for me, and they in turn (really my SIL--she pretty much did the whole thing) asked me what friends I would want to invite. Since I have few friends at all, and fewer nearby, we just had the one shower. That was my contribution. When one of my friends found out she was pregnant, I told her I would love to throw a shower for her if nobody else called it first, so I ended up getting to help one of her high school friends with her shower, which was a very big friends/family shower, both sides of her family. I think her contribution was being asked if she had any theme preferences, but we all mostly did what we wanted to do to make it nice. So let them have fun and answer any questions they ask you. :)