4 Month Old Sleep Changes/issues

Updated on December 08, 2009
M.H. asks from Las Vegas, NV
8 answers

My son will be 4 months in three days. The past two weeks his sleep patterns have changed. He is now all of a sudden only taking 45 min naps a day. I used to be able to get him to sleep longer by giving him a paci or patting him for a min or two after the 45 mins to get him to sleep longer. But that doesnt work anymore. All the books I have read on sleep say that they need at least an hour nap at this age...I have read so many books on sleep that I think I am putting too much pressure on myself to do the right thing, but of course it never goes exactly how the books says. I am also (past two days) starting to stop swaddling him leaving one arm out because he is getting too big and keeps breaking his swaddle anyways. I used to lay him down when he was tired and give him his paci and he would fall asleep. Well, not anymore. He now fusses and cries when I lay him down. I have been trying to let him cry sometimes, but its very hard for me to listen to... I just want to create good sleeping habits for my little guy because with my first son, I was holding him to sleep, rocking him, patting his butt until he would fall asleep. I DONT want to have to do that this time around and I cant, I have a 2 year old running around the house while I am trying to get my little guy to sleep.

I know I am babbling on about this...so what I am looking for is other mothers stories and suggestions on getting babies to sleep. Any other 4 month old babies only take 45 min naps? After 45 mins, should I be rocking him back to sleep? I know he is still tired after 45 mins, but I dont want him to depend on me to rock him back to sleep. What do you think about CIO methods, have they worked for you? I just want to teach good sleep habits, unlike my two year old who still needs help falling asleep. I feel like I created my two year olds bad habits by always helping him fall asleep.

Thanks

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M.G.

answers from Chicago on

My boy is four months, too. I also have a 2 and 3-year-old running around the house. The baby will cry if put down sometimes. Usually he falls asleep nursing. Other times I put him in his swing when he's fussy and tired, and it works magic. I know, I know...

At this moment, he was playing with his overhead hanging toy and just rolled to his side and went to sleep! So if tired he can do this.

I know I am not following the books by letting him fall asleep nursing or swinging. With the older two, once they were smart enough to understand routine, they went along with it (with some protests of course along the way). Mommy comes in and tucks you in, etc.

I do not worry about his naps. He naps in the car anytime. Whatever he does, he does. All my kids sleep well at night. The oldest two don't nap usually. We just try to keep everyone fed and happy. Whew!

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C.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hey M.,
Don't be in a hurry to end the swaddling if your son still needs it. Some babies need to be swaddled for longer periods of time depending on how early they were born and their developmental rate.
I have heard great things about the Miracle Blanket which seems to keep the baby swaddled until they are unswaddled. There is also another item called the Wombie which also keeps the baby nice and snug and does not require swaddling.

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J.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

my son wakes up 1/2 way through his nap and i let him fuss for about 5 minutes before I even think about going in to him. Often times he is back asleep for about another hour. At that age I can't remember for sure, but my son has never been a great sleeper and is at 2 almost sleeping through the night. His world changes on a daily basis... just try letting him fuss for a little bit before getting him. Also... how many naps? At that age my son was on 2 naps.

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K.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hello! First of all, don't worry too much about what the books say. Your son will sleep when he is tired. Do you give him a bottle just before you put him down? I know when my baby is tired at nap time, but he really needs the bottle to fill him up and get him relaxed, then I put him in his crib - he is usually awake and either goes right to sleep or cries for 2-3 minutes and falls asleep. If I don't use the bottle though, he won't sleep. Just a suggestion. Good luck!

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K.H.

answers from San Diego on

This is the age where babies change their sleep patterns. I am not a fan of the CIO method. Please pick up the book Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Weissbluth. This book has some great tips for helping you recognize your baby and toddler's sleep patterns.

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

There will be sleep "changes" and phases all throughout babyhood and toddlerhood.
Sleep for a baby/child always changes, per growth-spurts/developmental & cognitive changes and hitting milestones too. AND, they often occur all at the same time... not one at a time exclusively.

Your baby seems fine. Don't worry about "bad sleep habits" at this point. A baby needs to sleep and will eventually have their own "rhythm" & ability about it. Some kids, (like your son needing you to fall asleep) and my daughter is like that... are different.

The main thing is going according to their "cues" for tiredness... and having a regular consistent pre-sleep and bedtime routine. Kids NEED to also have a wind-down period before actually hitting the sack. So they can unwind. AND, what helps, is not to get too "overstimulated" prior to bed or nap time. This will only get them too hyper OR over-tired to actually sleep well. Overtired-ness actually prevents a baby/child from falling asleep well and sleeping well.

Some babies, (like my kids at that age), will sort of fuss or make noises or babble/play before actually sleeping. That's okay. Let them. And often they will fall asleep on their own... its sorta of them having their own "routine" and self-soothing routine before falling asleep. For me, if I interrupted that process in them... I actually "woke" them or irritated them.. and THEN they would start crying/screaming and NOT being able to fall asleep or get themselves in sleep mode.
But if the baby is actually CRYING and needing you... then comfort him. Its okay. He is a baby and they need that.

Don't worry... it will work out. When my daughter was around and I was trying to put my younger son to nap... I merely explained to her that at these times she has to make "quiet" and let Mommy take care of brother... and play by herself. And then she understood. THEN, after I put her brother to nap... it was HER time and Mommy was right there. But we ALL have to work as a "TEAM" otherwise her brother will get TOO tired and fussy, and that's not good. She understood. Kids need explaining to, about their baby siblings. So they can understand... instead of just trying to read Mommy's mind. AND, whenever her brother was napping... this was QUIET time. It was my daily everyday routine with them, every single day. SO, my eldest child completely understood. And when her brother was napping, my daughter fell into place. Its the routine you create... to help you... that if done consistently, the kids will understand.

all the best,
Susan

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C.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

M.-i used the swing to let my little one nap up until she was 8 months old. I know...what they say about doing that but she took awesome 2 hrs naps..2-3x a day starting at 2 months....Now she is 2 1/2 and takes 3-4hour naps, in her crib of course...let nature take its coarse and eventually it will work out.

The swing worked for my daughter and I agonized thinking I was not being a good mom...but it worked and I got over it...I used the papasan swing..went through batteries like crazy!

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S.H.

answers from Hartford on

Catnappers tend to nap throughtout the day, taking naps ranging anywhere from 30 minutes to several hours with 1-2 hours in between each nap. This sounds like pretty normal 4 month old behavior. My five month old still catnaps with 3-5 good naps a day. I still swaddle him when he goes down for naps and when he first goes to bed - he only now is sleeping occassionally without a swaddle and it greatly reduces the length of his sleep.

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